John Wayne Rides Again

(John Wayne Bobitt is making a porno film)

She had a sharp tongue
That slashed as she kissed
Cut a long story short
With a flick of her wrist

She sliced him to shreds
With her razor-sharp wit
Parted him from
His poor wedding kit

And she held it aloft
Like Liberty's flame
And her head was crowned
With feminist fame

She bagged the 'War
Of the Sexes' World Cup
Then tossed it aside
Like an unwanted pup

She stubbed it out
Like a dog-end of lust:
The beef cigar
Exploded and bust

All over the tabloids
Whose limp leaders read:
'Cut Off In His Prime
But His Sex-Drive Ain't Dead'

They sewed it back on,
They stitched him up twice,
His limp little friend
Was coming on nice

Ly, and soon it would harden
Bobbit's resolve
To be re-membered
And at-length involved

In the cut and thrust
Of celluloid sex:
A re-studded stud
Only signing blank cheques

Now he dreams
Of all the bucks he will earn
Not as a going-
but a coming concern.