I can never self-express cause you can never be me

 I joined a fight club, thinking it would help me express my anger
The bell rang, a whimper really
I tried to get mad, but I felt nothing
It made me want to give up
He threw a punch
I dodged
I threw a punch
He blocked
He threw a punch
I dodged
I threw a punch
He blocked
I kicked him in the ribs as he charged
“Are you wearing steel-toes!?”
“Yeah”
“Don't do that shit again!”
“Sorry”
He threw a punch
I dodged
I threw a punch
He blocked
It went on like this until I was wheezing so hard we called off the fight
We both walked away, gaining nothing but headaches and a few bruises
I can't express myself with words
I can't express myself with my body
As soon as I crawled into bed the rage came back, I punched myself in the head until I was satisfied.