73. 99 Luftballons

...But, of course, there were the children to worry about too. Any uninjured Earthbound had already fled. The children were screaming or stunned into silence, the screams coming from boys mostly. The TV guy was still rolling. Was it a live stream? Why had no-one shot him? Uriel and The Ancient Formerly Known As G-O-D were still coming towards the lectern and FLOTUS. ‘Beelzebuttons’ was right behind them. He still had hold of all those balloons. In fact, there were more like a hundred all of a sudden.

By now Uriel and TAFKAG were right by Lilith. La Divina Sofia was now statuesque in both senses. Margarita Cansino was standing even closer behind Lilith with a half-smile on her carmine lips. The eternal creator and Uriel were just staring at Lilith. Mr D handed Sam Sara two balloons and whispered out of the side of his pan-sticked mouth.

‘Click your heels when it’s time. You’ll know when. Oh and don’t forget the words. You’ll know what to say.’

Lilith came out from behind the lectern and tried to confront Uriel. TAFKAG was staring into the distance and Uriel was keeping him between himself and everybody else. The Redhead grabbed hold of Lilith, who struggled for a second or two then gave up.

‘What in hell is this supposed to achieve, Uriel? I’m hardly going to die, am I?

Uriel smiled like a mafia don before the henchmen murder everyone else around the gingham tablecloth. ‘No, but you’ll go away for a while. FLOTUS can’t possibly survive that.’

He pointed at the paradise vest, ‘I was going to give him a dead man’s switch, but we all know, he can’t manage the most simple task now.’ He held up a burner phone.

‘So what? I’ll just say I escaped.’ Lilith said. ‘Brave Lila Radziwill survives terror blast. The optics will be fantastic.’

‘That’s why Haskell Wexler over there is shooting right now.’

The shot sounded pretty loud. One of Uriel’s Celestials took over the camera.

‘There is always collateral damage. I really am sorry about the orphans’.

There was loud bang and a flash. It wasn’t the bomb. Mr D was suddenly looking more himself. Forty orphans were already in the air, holding on to two balloons each, following a bemused looking Sam Sara, whose high heel pumps had come off the minute she’d tapped her heels together. Mother Innovación and the Demonettes had made themselves scarce. La Divina Sofia had fainted or died of fright and was lying on the steps.

Satan, now in a more familiar aspect, smiled, ‘Gabe, if you wouldn’t mind,we will soon be going on a short flight. You take Lilith. Margarita will be staying with Uriel.’

The rogue CBI agents had already fled.

‘Margarita?’

‘Oh yes, she is very special. Kind of Earthbound, but not. Like Lilith. Only there’ll be no mistake, this time. Uriel will fall. He might enjoy it. I understand Ms Cansino has a way with handcuffs.’

The Redhead took the cell-phone from the head of the CBI’s hand and handed it to Mr D.  She linked her arm through Uriel’s. She whispered in his ear. His face turned red.

I must have looked puzzled.

Lucifer turned to me, ‘Aw, shucks Gabe, The Master and Margarita have been friends an awful long time.’