An Upper Class Guide To Choosing Domestic Staff

The English are lazy and do not like to work.
Foreigners are not lazy and embrace work.
The English always moan about the general lack of work.
Foreigners are grateful for whichever jobs they can find.
The English do not enjoy being unemployed.
Foreigners are very happy in their work.
The English cause trouble and are often surly, if not downright rude.
Foreigners do not cause trouble and only speak when they are spoken to.
The English are mostly addicted to one form of chemical or another.
Foreigners do not take drugs and drink conservatively.
The English sap the economy.
Foreigners help the economy.
The English cannot be trusted in one’s private dwelling.
Foreigners do not pose a risk as potential thieves.
The English smell.
Foreigners also smell.
The English should not be banned from working in the care industry.
Foreigners have a culture of care that is in great demand.
The English are terrible time-keepers.
Foreigners are always on time.
The English complain about work conditions and expect pay-rises.
Foreigners do not complain about anything or expect pay-rises.
The English are more cost-effective as unemployed.
Foreigners are more cost-effective as employed.
The English are not grateful for their housing, benefits and other forms of charity.
Foreigners indulge the state and their immigration confirms that multi-culturalism wards off terrorism.
English career-criminals are a lost cause and should be put on a banana boat.
Illegal foreigners are the most hardworking and are extremely easy to manipulative.