dim and light

dim and light by MarciaMarcia

April 2019

 

two...stand, 

each gaze at mirrors

 in a bedroom lit 

only by daylight, 

through an 

open window

the two haven’t spoken  since morning...

it is almost dusk

 

She looks...

She speaks...

“What shall I be

 now that I am 71 yrs me....

and whispers... 

“a phrase....a question....a quest?”

 

He looks

and thinks....

  “What should I do. I am 76 years ...through ?”

his mind plays his memory...

Quests lost...Quests won

whispering...

“still...in attendance 

I stand....ready waiting,

here...I’ll run”

looking down 

at his feet ...then 

back to the mirror...he points...

“Who......there, stares  at me...body....weak kneed 

.....and weary?”

Something familiar, hot and burning

 rises up inside his chest. 

he looks away 

in angered discontent, 

a sadness reveals 

time before

he’s looked outward, always

for the cause...but

....with eyes closed

 

The room darkens for an instant clouds pass across the path 

of the soon, setting sun

 

within this softened dim 

as moment’s thoughts tumble

His and Her’s

each separate 

within one story

their’s... 

they intertwine

 

such fragile truths 

selves baring light 

now  come to mind 

seen...here

within time’s move 

today’s dawn to dusk...

and then’s

journeyed youth to aged call...

all secreted in place....

long in aching, angered,  blame...

await awakening escape

 

She does not know she whispers her gaze

“whispers...of the mind” 

she shakes her head

clarity of half truths 

realized

truths about her

truths about him

truths about 

each to the other

then...

here...

now...

all rise

in silenced hesitance 

within her breast

as deep pressing breath 

meets parted lips...

in trusted hope 

that words

freely spoken....

are received

accepted and love heard....

without judgement...

all may abide the glazed gaze 

reflected there

 

He speaks...

“Can word’s...pained, 

reveal 

once exposed in a 

sharing,

one with another,  

be safely enveloped

forever protected 

by arms 

in hearts...”

His in Her’s 

Her’s in His?”

spoken...freed...from self, 

given here...

then, forever vanquished?

 

He turns and looks...

and sees...Her

with opened heart 

with opened eyes

what once was 

what is now, 

standing before him...

standing before her 

reflections cast

in the glass

 

She turns toward him 

seeing real...

all his dreams

all he was 

all he is still

all...that is no more

all...that may ever will be

 

eyes meet his...

her’s

across this seeking space 

a place grown long and far in it’s making

within time’s retreat 

selves into selves, 

turned ego’s playground 

of denial

there......and here

is...not one silenced morning into dusk ...

but one of so many

 

in this room filled

with moments upon moments past

pace stops

clear reflected sights

come quick to light

 

He....

She..

each to each...together:...

speak....

with lips as one

“thoughts be spoken,

heard by ears...

received...with 

no perception’s alter 

those...

the loneliest of

truth’s  truths

 

two reflections stand 

within the housed glass

eyes gaze outward

His at Him,

Her’s at Her

once unrecognized unintegrated 

doubt’s full presence 

in this moment’s notice 

turns lighted realty

 

each asks

“who...is now 

and 

who...has been

can there be such duality of vision

of version 

of the her...of the him

has time stollen raw

what evening’s dim of dusk

can no longer hide

 

compelled to look 

as if to listen 

entranced.....

two reflections seek on

and speak

 

“while youth spent 

its slipping time

skipping cracks 

with jumps to catch

rhyme’s reasons

for onward grasp

He lost sight

She lost sound

Both lost 

the other’s hollowed ground....

The He of Him

The She of Her

that once stopped stilled and stirred

the sounding depths

of each...to each....

Is now heard”

 

She lifts her hand

In reach to touch

she thinks out loud 

“to thaw, 

the cold glazed refraction within this gaping glass”

her chilled fingers trace the lines, trenchantly grooved 

across the still of time’s distortion......

to remove.....

 

She... “ Where is this place, that eyes visit and fingers draw 

that has not felt 

in truth till now 

my eyes do see 

the me of me.”

 

one moment’s 

dissipating  beat

outed rhythm’s 

tempted ways 

made away 

time’s space

it grasped instead 

of each to each

Illusive gains contained within an onward pace

 

eyes once sought 

His toward Her’s

In the then

and passed unfocused

swiftly breached 

time’s beyond....

and thus lost self...complete

in run to stay the step

 

Her raised arm in blocking sight of time’s rewind

She:...

“shadowed vision must be seen,” she points

“another....self...there

where free and boundless youth once dwelt...

she moves her hand 

here...and here,

to touch the heart 

and leans toward 

an image so set apart

and  sees

”Myself”

 

He:...

“in body’s statured, status step undone...

slowed to frail...

where anger 

pressed denial’s taunts, 

time’s toll.....felled...the image.....there”

his pointed hand to heart

turned

toward her

their silent speech 

walks the space 

this longing dusk 

embraced 

In trust

the felt held words, 

given there

flowed upward

where 

she stood  

in gaze at him

as her’s and his, words  rose from sounding depths 

beneath their breast

released and freed, 

met his 

each  to each these

lifted in receive

 

embraced beginnings 

remembered 

then 

now understood

 

the spin slowed and stopped 

time gave back 

the years that were them... 

in the evening’s setting sun and made again

Illuminations.....won... one

 

By Marcia D Miller