The Doctor.

All of us have used a doctor at least just once in our lives, this includes even before we were born, for some of us. Doctors, they are trusted, even though some turned out to be serial killers, but that is rare.

This week when I was at work, a work colleague, wanted to see his doctor. He told me, “To see my doctor, everyone has to take pictures of what is wrong and send the pictures to the receptionist, the receptionist then has to look at the pictures and it is they who then decides if the person who has sent in the pictures of their body, if they think the doctor should see the patient, or not.” He had told me what was wrong, but then he said, “What would happen if it was my willy?” He had a good point. The photos, surely that is open to abuse, sending private and personal pictures of yourself, to complete strangers, in my opinion, and I certainly wouldn’t do it. If the person was dying, I suppose they would have to. But I wouldn’t, ever send a private photo of myself to anyone! Period. I would have to change doctors’ surgery, I hope that doesn’t catch on, elsewhere.

I had felt unwell, and later on the same day, I decide to phone my doctor too. I had been unwell for about ten days, but I was away looking after my Mum who as dementia, it was my turn.

I left the office, and rang my doctors, I asked, “Please can I see a doctor today, have you got a cancellation?” She replied, “We are fully booked up, I can give you the phone number for the out of hours?” I was disappointed, and said, “OK, thank you.” I wrote the number down, but I had no intention of going, to an unknown place.

Back in the office, I thought about it, and how fearful I had been, when I was away from home and with my Mum, unable to tell her, and seeing the blood. I decided to ring the out of hours doctors, so I went back out into the large garden again and rang the number. The woman replied, “The earliest, you could be seen here, would be Sunday.” I was gobsmacked, that was a very long time away. I replied, “Sunday?” She said, “Yes.” I replied, “OK, I will leave it.”

I decided to go to my own doctors the next morning. To do that, we have to arrive before 8am and queue up outside. I had the sense to write down on paper what I wanted to say, as I knew there would be people in front and behind me in the queue.

I had planned to leave the house at 07.30am that didn’t happen. I had had a shower first, so I would be ready for when the doctor saw me. I arrived at the doctors for 07.50am, there was already eight people in the queue, I had hoped to be first, I would have been first, if I had got there for 07.30am.

In the queue, there is always a chatty one, today there was no exception. The lady was talking to me. I always wonder why people are there, then a lady approached me, coughing I thought, mercy! She, thankfully didn’t stand right behind me, but to my left, and continued to cough over there. A lady arrived late for her blood test, she knocked on the door, the receptionist came out and she said, “I have a blood test at ten to eight,” She was let in and the receptionist asked, “Has anyone in the queue got an appointment?” A man said, “I have at 08.00,” He was let in, so then the woman that was talking to him, now turned, and talked to me, with her cup of tea in her hand. I was on my phone, doing the Wordle daily word game. I had replied to her politely, then she said to me, “I’m just going to put my cup back in the car.” I replied, “OK.” She came back and stood in front of me, I had thought, If I wanted to start World War three, I could have not let her back in front of me. Soon after that the receptionist came to the door again to let us all in.

The receptionist said to the women before me, “There are no more appointments left.” The rules of my doctors are, at 08.00am and not before, you have to phone at 08.00am to ask for an appointment, but no one can get through on the phones, as everyone is trying to ring at that time, so when you do get through a few minutes later, all the allocated appointments for that day, have all gone! When that happens, the receptionist will say, “Please ring tomorrow at 8.00am.” So, unless you actually want to see the doctor, you have to go there in person, before 08.00am, or you are doomed!

I was worried, when I heard that there were no more appointments left, told to the women before me, she also wanted two prescriptions.

Then it was my turn, I handed my paper to her, I had put in the note, everything I needed to get my information across, without having to say anything. She read it carefully and said, “There are no appointments left, but you have asked for a female doctor. There is a female doctor in today, I will ask her, if she will see you or not.” She put my paper down, and typed to the doctor. Then the receptionist said, to me, “I will phone you back, if the doctor can see you or not.” I replied, “OK, thank you,” and left.

At home, the phone rang at 09.30am it was the receptionist, she said, “The doctor will see you at 15.20pm,” I said, “That’s fantastic, thank you.”

I had felt a bit better, as I had not seen blood that day, but all of that day, I had felt an ache, or was that now my imagination. There definitely was an ache before, for that was what had first caught my attention.

I then went to work, and had to write on the back of my hand 320, so that I wouldn’t forget, and at a place where I wouldn’t wash it off by accident. It would be terrible, if after all this hassle, that I went and forgot.

At the doctors, I had to sign in to say I was here, by touching that horrible screen thing. Before covid, the person’s name would be on a large screen and which person they were there to see and in which room, but now the nurse or doctor comes to reception and call out your name.

A woman wearing bright blue disposable gloves came into the waiting room and said to the other woman in the waiting room, “Maxine?” I lifted my hand up, and smiled. She said, “Please follow me.” Horrible alarm bells went off in my head, and I felt uneasy, and thought to myself, I hope she is not going to use those now dirty gloves to examine me!!!!

I watched her very closely. I sat on the bed, and I said to her, “I hope you are NOT going to examine me with those gloves.” I was deadly serious. I wash my hands when I am at work up to one hundred times, sometimes more. She replied calmly and with confidence, “I may not need to touch you.” I thought oh yes you will!!!! I told the doctor again, “You need to change your gloves, you are not touching me with those gloves, that has been all the way to the reception and back here to your office.” She could see that I was serious, and took off the dirty gloves and without washing her hands put on a clean pair of gloves. I don’t know what sort of cut backs she is experiencing but it was Very unprofessional. It is a good job she was not going to take my blood pressure, as it would have gone through the roof! She had completely stressed me out. But I soon calmed down, when she changed the gloves.

All I needed was reassurance and peace of mind, for I had thought of people, who had found something and that was the beginning of the end for them. I did actually think, no one lives for ever and was this my beginning?

The receptionist the day before had said to me, “We have no appointments, you can go to the out of hours surgery or the hospital, accident, and emergency! I thought that was a bit extreme. If I had gone to the A&E I would have been there twenty-fours hours waiting, for something so trivial. Although, at first it didn’t feel trivial, for I was genuinely afraid. For the unknown, made me afraid.

Despite the glove issue, the doctor was lovely and made me feel much better. Peace was once again restored to my mind. I know some lovely people who are poorly with very serious conditions, how must they feel, on a daily basis? Knowing for them it is not trivial? I had my fears, they too have theirs, my fears only lasted ten days, theirs have lasted many months. I think of them when I get into bed, for at night, fears feel worse, alone with  many private thoughts, and then sleep won’t come.

I thought about the doctor, and I wondered if she had been brought up in a very poor background and saw the gloves as luxury items, not to be wasted. I said half-jokingly to my husband, “I wouldn’t have been surprised, if she had used it for the patient before me.” She wasn’t going to change those gloves, but I insisted!!

That night when I went to bed, I did let my mind wonder, what would have happened, if she had touched me with those gloves the, the ones she had on, and touched all the handles and doors, used by all the sick patients, visitors, doctors, and nurses and then ME!

I think her mean actions would have made me ill and I would have needed many years of counselling.

Thankfully all is well, keep alert!