A Days Work For Bamber

A  Days Work For Bamber 

By Paul McCann

 

On a lovely August morning in Ardoyne , some of the local lads were putting the final touches to their guiders and go carts for the street races during the Fleadh . Frankie and Sham were up and down their ladder washing the windows on house’s around the streets . Mrs Doherty was on her way home from O’Hara’s bakery shop and spied big Junior walking in front of her . She started walking faster to catch up with him .

“ Good morning Junior “ She said ,

“What about you Mrs Doherty “

“ Hello son , are you busy today “

Big Junior looked at her and said .

“ I’ve a few things to do this morning “

“When you finish could you do me a wee favour , if you’ve time “

Junior looked at her and replied .

"Thing is Mrs Doherty , I’ve got my hands full. The Ardoyne Fleadh is almost ready to happen and I haven’t any free time “ He said .

“I’ll pay you for your trouble .“ Said Mrs Doherty .

Big Junior knew what she was like and had done her too many favours before and never got l paid .

“ As I was saying to you Mrs Doherty , the thing is I’ve got a lot on and could be busy right up to the end of next week .“ Said Big Junior and he added .

“See me in a week or two and If it’s only an hours work , I’ll get it sorted .”

She looked hard at him and said . “ All right then . If you’re too busy I’ll

see if wee ah , what’s his name , Bamber can to do the job “

Big Junior said “ Grand , right you be then Mrs Doherty. “

After that he had a turn of foot and his big bean pole legs stretched out into walking double time and was well out of the way in a minute or two . As chance would have it she spied Bamber coming up the street towards her .

Mrs Doherty smiled and said,  “I’ve a wee job for you Bamber if you’ve an hour to spare this morning and I’ll give you something for your trouble .”

Bamber didn’t look impressed and said ,  “Well that would be just great . Thanks for that . What can I do for you Mrs Doherty ?”

“My front garden has a few weeds they need to be pulled out “

She said . Bamber looked at here and half smiled and replied ,

“ So now it’s just a weeding job . “ 

She smiles and said ,  “Aye that’s it . Can you start right away ?”

Bamber replied ,  “Let me just get changed first and I’ll be there in a half hour .“

She responded “Right , so I’ll see you soon . When you come, I’ll leave a bucket and garden trowel on the grass for you “

When Bamber arrived to pull out the weeds Mrs Doherty was standing there at the front door .

“Have you time for a cup of tea before you start work ?”

Bamber immediately replied , “No thanks Mrs Doherty , I better get started. “

She didn’t look happy with that and went back inside the house .

Bamber thought twice about having a cup tea as Mrs Doherty could spread the word that he hadn’t time to have a cup of tea with her .. Next thing people will talk and say how rude I was . So probably I’d better off taking the cup of tea . It’ll only take twenty seconds to swallow it and then I won’t end up with a bad reputation .” So Bamber went and accepted her offer and drank her tea and then started doing the job she wanted done . She specifically asked for him to pull out all of the weeds around her rose garden bed .

As Bamber began working he noticed that Mrs Doherty was watching his every move from her front window . Just as soon as most of the weeds were removed , Mrs Doherty opened up the window as shouted , 

“Bamber could you give the roses a wee prune while you’re there . I left the snippers there for you in the bucket “.

Bamber responded ,

“Ok I will do that Mrs Doherty “ and under his breath , he said to himself , 

“You must be kidding . As if I’ve nothing better to do today .

Mr’s Doherty brought a bigger bucket to Bamber in his knees in the front garden and said ,

“Sorry Bamber to trouble you , I just remembered that it’s August and it’s that time of the year to prune back the roses , I’m so glad you’re here this morning, could you put all the rose clippings in this bucket for me and I’ll try to strike them later . “

As Bamber did went to work pruning back the roses he noticed she was now watching from the upstairs window .  As Bamber was almost finished the pruning , Mrs Doherty opened the window upstairs and shouted ,

“Bamber , I’m just thinking , while you’re there , could you dig out those roses and by replant them in that other garden bed underneath the front parlour window .“

Bamber replied 

“Ok , will do “  and under his breath he said .

“I don’t believe this . It was just a weeding job and now it’s turned into a garden renovation . God give me patience.”

.Mrs Doherty came out with a garden spade and said .

“I’m thinking those roses would do much better in that garden bed . It’s gets more sunlight and shelter there . Thanks Bamber . I’m so glad you’re here this morning .“

Bamber took the spade and went to work .Just as he had almost finished replanting the roses Mrs Doherty opend up the parlour window and said ,

“While you’re there could you mind extending that garden bed to about twice its size . I’m thinking I might as well get some new roses for that bed now .“

“Ok will do “ said Bamber and under his breath he said “While I’m here I might just dig a big hole and put you in it .”

He started laughing to himself and Mrs Doherty opened up the window and said “Are you all right there Bamber .”

Bamber stopped laughing . , “I’m ok Mrs Doherty , I was just talking about a program

I watched last night on the TV . It was funny . Monthly Python’s Flying Circus . Well Mrs Doherty I’m just about finished now . Is that all you were wanting done today?"

“That’s about everything Bamber . Come on inside , I’ve got a wee bit of lunch for you .“

Bamber went in and she had a boiled egg , some toast and a cup of tea .

Bamber sat down and ate . After Bamber had finished she handed him an envelope and thanked him

for the great work he had done around her garden . Bamber took the envelope and put it in his pocket and said thanks and goodbye to Mrs Doherty .

As he walked down the street he opened up the envelope and took out the wee prayer card to St Fiacre the patron saint of gardeners .

Under his breath he murmured

“ You never know what you’re going to get until you get it . I wasn’t expecting this wee surprise “

 

 

The End