Child (Work in Progress)

Cherry

By midgeryall

Sun, 11 Oct 2020
  • 421 reads
2 comments
 

Everything was different, then

The way the leaves turned to dust

Even the copper hues of all those

Near-bare branches

The crunching in the wind

Of limb on limb

Surely even that sounded different, before.

She could lift herself above it all

Fingers splayed to spread her weight

Zero fucks given

To the cold wetness of the ledge

Numb in puddles

And stainless steel realness

Soil caked nails

And tattered wind-torn tresses

A flannel ready in a sandwich bag

To wipe away worries

When playtime was done.

Certificate 15
Poem
Miscellaneous

Comments

Submitted by airyfairy on

This works on so many levels - the descriptions are really visceral, and the way they evoke childhood is very skilful.  The last three lines are such an effective contrast, reminding us that this fearless and fearsome creature is, indeed, a child.

With my ABC editor's hat on, I've changed it to a Cert 15 because of the one instance of explicit language.  

Enjoyed this greatly.

Submitted by penguin on

It's a nice ending. Zero fucks given does actually seem to be in a  different tone to the rest of the poem.