Thomas

I can’t get the dream out of my head.

Ringo Starr was talking. “It was a busy day on the Island of Sodor. Thomas was delivering cake for the Fat Controller’s afternoon tea.”

“Peep! Peep! Hello, sir. I’ve brought your cakes. Chocolate gateau, cheesecake, lemon drizzle, and banoffee pie.” 

The Fat Controller strolled up to Thomas, hooked his thumbs into his braces and looked him in the eye. “I think you have forgotten something, Thomas.”

“Oh no,” said Ringo Starr, “Thomas has forgotten the Fat Controller’s doughnuts.”

“I’m very sorry, sir,” Thomas stammered. “I was helping Percy deliver Christmas presents to the orphanage and I must have forgotten your doughnuts.”

“My doughnuts are more important than orphans, Thomas. You know that.”

“Yes, sir, sorry, sir.”

“I am very disappointed in you, Thomas,” said the Fat Controller. “Engines on my railway do exactly what they are told. It’s a week in The Hole for you.”

“Not The Hole, Sir,” Thomas pleaded. “I’ve learned my lesson, sir. I’ll be good from now on. I’ll be a Really Useful Engine, sir.”

Behind Thomas a huge door swung open in the wall, a yawning darkness within. 

“It’s too late, Thomas. In The Hole. Now.”

Thomas began reversing slowly towards the open door, muttering to himself. “I’m a really useful engine, I’m a really useful engine, I’m a really useful engine, I’m a really, Oh screw you, Fat C-” Thomas’s whistle shrieked furiously, black smoke spurted from his funnel. His wheels span on the track, and he shot forwards, leaping from the rails.

Thomas hit the Fat Controller head on, sending him flying back, knocking his top hat off. He lay on his back, staring up as Thomas loomed over him. Then he screamed as Thomas lowered his mouth to the round belly. A flash of razor-sharp teeth, a sound of tearing, then the screaming stopped. The legs twitched then were still. 

Thomas looked at me, blood dripping from his snarling lips. “Tell everyone what you have seen,” he said. 

That’s when I woke up. This time I mean it. No more drugs for me.