My Girl and Me (Dead Reckoning series - Part 18)

Continued from Episode 17 (Words)

The story so far:   Josiah, having rekindled a romance with an old flame, Jeanette DeVille, has apparently disappeared since his supper with her at Evanley Hall last Saturday.  When he failed to appear for work on Monday, Archibald and Samantha first tried his house, to no avail, and then reported to the police, who weren't interested.  In the meantime, Samantha has assumed control of the good ship Oakshott and Underwood but she wants to know what has happened to Josiah, and she has a cunning plan!:

 

Archibald Thurble burst out of the door of, what had until recently been, Josiah Oakshott’s office, launching himself into the corridor beyond.  With ragged breaths, he yelled into the office behind him,

“No, I won’t!”

And slammed the door shut.

Mr. Strine, who had been observing events from a few yards away, sidled up to Archibald.

“You alright, Archie, me lad?” He asked, solicitously, eyes flicking from side to side.

“No!” Archibald responded, shaking his head and breathing heavily.

“What’s she done to yer, lad?” Mr. Strine looked very concerned, “’cause I’ll tell yer, whatever it is, me and the lads are behind yer, all the way!” He said, emphatically, then, after a moment’s thought, added, “’cept Egbert, ‘e says ‘e’ll be in front of yer, on account of ‘ow ‘e’s not adverse to a bit of sexual ‘arassment, if there’s some going”

“It’s…it’s nothing like that” Archibald gulped.

“I ‘ope yer kept yer ‘and on yer ‘a’penny?” Mr. Strine frowned.

“I don’t know” Archibald shook his head, “I don’t know if I’ve got one, or even where it is!” He wailed.

“Ah well,” Mr. Strine nodded, “in that case, yer prob’ly all right” He conceded.  “So, what’s she want yer to do then, eh?”

“She wants…” Archibald gulped and tried to contain his emotions.

“Go on, lad” Mr. Strine encouraged, “I’ll have the lads out on strike, if need be”

“She wants…she wants me to visit my girlfriend” Archibald managed, at last.

Mr. Strine looked at him, blankly.

“Visit yer girlfriend?” He said, eventually.

Archibald nodded.

“Don’t get me wrong, Archie, me lad” Mr. Strine rubbed his grizzled chin, “and I may ‘ave got the wrong end of the stick, ‘ere, if yer know what I mean.  But, speakin’ as I find, that don’t seem to be too much to ask, if yer get me drift?”

“I don’t want to go!” Archibald wailed, again.

“Well, she’s your girlfriend” Mr. Strine shrugged his shoulders, “I suppose you know best, all I can say is, if it was my girlfriend…werl!” A faint light of fond memory appeared in Mr. Strine’s eyes.

“You don’t…you don’t know where she lives!” Archie gulped.

“Well, no, ‘course I don’t” Mr. Strine shook his head, deeply aware that this conversation was definitely getting away from him, “why would I?  She’s your girlfriend!”

The office door opened, at that moment, and Samantha Knight appeared.

“Ah, Archibald, Mr. Strine” She nodded to each, in turn.

“Mrs.” Mr. Strine attempted to tug a missing forelock, “Archie ‘ere reckons as ‘ow yer tryin’ to force ‘im to visit ‘is girlfriend” He realised, even as he was saying this, just how ridiculous it sounded.

“Well, I think the word ‘force’ is, perhaps, a little strong” Samantha began, smoothing down her skirt.

“You said as ‘ow it was the right thing for the business!” Archibald said, accusingly.

“Well, yes, I think it is” Samantha nodded.

“What, ‘im seein’ ‘is girlfriend?”  Mr. Strine looked thoroughly confused.

“In this case, yes,” Samantha agreed, “not because of who she is, but because of where she is”

“And where’s that, then?”

“The same place that Josiah went to, last Saturday”

“Ah! I see!” Mr. Stine nodded, sagely.

“Why can’t you send ‘im, instead?”  Archibald sniffled, jerking a thumb in Mr. Strine’s direction.

“Ah, now, let’s not be too ‘asty, Archie!” Mr. Strine said, hurriedly, “just ‘ang on a moment, it is your girlfriend, when all’s said an’ done!”

“You said you were right behind me!” Archibald pointed out.

“Well, yeah” Mr. Strine nodded, “but that was afore I ‘ad all the facts”

“Archie, all you have to do is to go and see Precious…” Samantha began but was interrupted by Mr. Strine stifling a giggle, she frowned at him and ploughed on, “and just see if she’s got anything to say about Mr. O.  If not, then there’s no harm done and that’s an end to it”

“Does ‘e get to use a company car?” Mr. Strine asked.

“Of course!” Samantha nodded, “expenses and everything”

“Seems to me, you’d be a fool not to, young Archie” Mr. Strine urged, “’Ow often is it yer get to see yer girlfriend, all expenses paid, eh?” He nudged Archibald with his elbow, and leered.

“Alright!” Archibald snapped, “I’ll go!  But if she says nowt about Mr. O., then I’m straight back home”

“Of course, Archie” Samantha patted him on the shoulder.

“Are you coming with me?”

“Well, I would, but we’ve got potential clients coming in all day, today.  I need to be here, I’m afraid.” Samantha gave him a weak smile.

“How about ‘im?” Archibald nodded toward Mr. Strine, who jumped back as if someone had delivered an electric shock.

“Same problem, Archie.  I need Mr. Strine to oversee the practical side of preparing our clients for their funerals” Samantha said, much to Mr. Strine’s relief.

“So, I’ve got to go on me tod?” Archibald looked thoroughly miserable.

“It’s yer girlfriend, Archie, this…” Mr. Strine looked at Samantha, questioningly,

“Precious” Samanta supplied, Mr. Strine stifled a snort and continued,

“Yeah, ‘er.  What’s there to be worried about?”

“It’s not just ‘er though, is it?” Archibald thrust his hands deep into his pockets and looked dejected.

“If you’re in any doubt, you just come straight home” Samantha patted his shoulder again, but he shrugged her off.

“Easy for you to say!” He grumbled.

“Look, you’ve got your phone, haven’t you?” Samantha asked.  Archibald nodded, sulkily, “Well, there you are then!  Any trouble at all, you just ring me, and Mr. Strine and I will come running, won’t we, Mr. Strine?” She beamed at her colleague, who backed off, considerably.

“Ah, now, don’t get me wrong, ‘course I would” Mr. Strine held his hands up and continued to back along the corridor, “only, I got this knee, see?  I wouldn’t be no good if it comes to no runnin’” He explained, and vanished back into the workshop.

“Well, I’ll come running then” Samantha grinned.

“I’m not ‘appy” Archibald grizzled.

“I know you’re not, Archie, and I do value your help with this, honestly I do” She gave him a hug.

“You’re not after me ‘a’penny, are you?” Archibald muttered, from the depths of the hug.

“I think we can safely say that I’m not, Archie!” Samantha released him from the hug and winked.

Now read Part 19