Someone's Son Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO

 

The next morning provided an opportunity to think things out. It was time to talk about a truce with mom.

          And Sheldon did some serious thinking.

          I'm still just a kid, he thought. Larry once said life is like an autumn leaf hurrying before morning's gust of wind. "And no matter how smart you think you are, it's the way you handle yourself when things begin to get confused," he had said.

          And the boy was confused. He thought of his dad often, never dreaming he would be stupid enough to try and face his wife and son again. No letters, or phone calls for three years, just Support Payments.

          This was Sheldon’s favorite place, where he felt comfortable. It helped him remember happier times when dad was at home.

          From his bedroom window he heard crows ‘Caw-Calling.’ "Alarm clocks," mom preferred to call them. But she often had to come and wake him up. He liked that most times. To him, it meant she cared. And she was really a softie. He liked that too. It gave him a chance to feel like the man of the house.

          But he didn’t know how much of a man he could be now.

          His father was coming back.

          Sheldon was such a happy child. Everything began to click this past year. Mom said his blue eyes could lighten up dark corners, and the boy’s perfect white teeth could sure crack a smile.

          "They're white as December snow," mom told everyone.

But Sheldon thought his thick lips and high cheekbones spoiled his looks. He knew he got down on himself sometimes. That's the way he felt.  He was not the perfect boy some people thought he was.

          His mother thought he was handsome. So why should he argue? And besides, Sheldon knew some people thought he had Native blood. "Why's that?" he had asked. Was it because his skin tanned easily? Well he did look sort of dark. Maybe swarthy.

          He really wouldn't mind if he was a descendent of a Mi'kmaq Chief. Now that would be neat. Sheldon read a lot, and I enjoyed the legends of Glooscap, the Native God. His father often read him stories about Glooscap and his son Marten. And those father and son moments all came to an end when he left.

          Sheldon didn't remember much about why it happened. "Don't all parents disagree?" he used to ask himself.

          Aunt Jennifer said she could understand why his parents didn't stay together. She said they fought a lot. Mostly when Sheldon wasn't around.

          The boy still didn't understand why his father...his dad...decided to move to Toronto. Did it really matter what he called him? Some of Sheldon’s friends said "Pop" or "My Old Man." But he thought that was gross. Sometimes his father asked him to call him "Dad" instead of "Father."

          He said "Father," sounded too formal.

          But Sheldon liked "Father" better. Because when he prayed "Dear Father" at night alongside his bed, he thought of someone great and powerful. Like his own father...his dad.

 

The boy missed him so much at first. He used to pretend he would come back into his life. And that he would call out "Dad" again. And now he is coming back.

          Maybe he'll call him that now. "Dad." Sheldon wondered if he'd like that. He still missed him. Maybe this time he won't want to leave.

          “And he is great, and powerful too. He's smart and he loves me. That's why he's coming back,” were living thoughts that pounded inside the boy’s head.

          He just knew it.       And he still loved him a lot.

          When Sheldon’s parents split up --- he couldn’t understand why they called it ‘Divorced.’ ‘Split’ was more real, like a rock that doesn't exist as one large piece anymore. And his family was one big rock. Anyways, now his father was coming back into the picture.

          Mom had told him his dad phoned and said they had to talk. He said it was urgent.

          Sheldon remembered a little about that day. He was looking out the window like right now, and this shiny blue car pulled up. Somehow he knew it was his father. He tried not to run downstairs too eagerly and say how great it was to see him. But his heart was smashing against his ribcage.

          Somehow they all sat together over pancakes and sausages for supper. Sheldon thought that was supposed to be a meal for breakfast. Then his father and mom explained the new situation to him.

          It seems this stranger the boy hadn't heard from for three years was now going to spend the summer with him. What about his friends or his plans? Gee whiz, mom.   Inside, he was glad and curious at the same time. But, "Where were you when I needed you?" almost tore from his lips as he stared back.

          There was a new agreement between his parents and their lawyers for summer visitation rights. For little ole me, Sheldon thought. Was he lucky or was he lucky? This was supposed to be a chance for boy and father to be "Pals," again.

          But it was up to Sheldon if he wanted this arrangement. He had to make the final decision.

          What could he do but go along with it? It did seem strange that it was up to Sheldon about seeing his father again. One day a week. Saturday's only. How could he complain? He was just a kid.

          And the rest of the week the boy was supposed to pretend everything was normal. Like going back to the way it was. And supposedly looking forward to the next Saturday that came around.

          Mom and her son had a good talk later that night. He knew she worried about a lot about Sheldon the last couple of years. About growing up and becoming a man, glad that Larry was part of his life.

          And now, out of the blue, his father is back in his life planning on taking him out on Saturdays. How will Larry take it? This is usually his time together with Sheldon. Imagine a father wanting to only spend time with his son on Saturday. Pretty soon people will start calling Sheldon "The Saturday Boy" or something.

          So much about to happen that it was frightening. Sheldon’s thirteenth birthday was coming up in September and made him feel much older than when he turned twelve.

          How quickly life flows, from a little kid to a grown up boy, and now a father's pal. Gazing out his bedroom window was like looking at the past. When he was just a baby everyone told him what to do and when to eat. He didn't have to worry or think so much, like now.

          It was Sheldon’s final decision to see if they could be friends again. Even though he was still angry for him leaving in the first place. But Sheldon would give it a try. He had to.

          He had become used to his new safe world, with his mom. And Larry.

          Sheldon gripped the windowsill and looked down at the grass. "I have to trim you again," he said to the sky and the wind. It was one chore he really liked. If he pretended really hard, his pain could be cut away just like that grass. Then those hurting thoughts could be put on a shelf.

          “I do have to give my dad another chance,” Sheldon whispered. Maybe he could have a live-in father again. Mom and dad might even work things out together, too. Why not?

          But he didn't want all the sadness to go away. So much was hidden next to his heart under his shirt. It was his way of dealing with personal pain. Now the monster was ready to come out of the closet.

          His father came back into his life, like a runaway train. And he had to meet him for their first visit together. This Saturday.

          Sheldon’s heart was really pounding.

 

(c) 2019 Esther & Richard L. Provencher