When You Died By Your Own Hand

(for Lindy)

When you died
By your own hand

I really wasn’t involved

I didn’t feel
What I could have
What I should have
Maybe

As I was younger,
Less mature

(If I have matured,
Of course and that is...)

But I knew
You suffered
I knew you died
A little death every day
I knew the past
Refused to release you

Especially your mind

When you died
By your own hand

I really wasn’t involved

But today I look back
And ask:

Did you go to the Light
Of the World?

I like to think you did.
I need to think you did.

That you left that darkness
For the Light.