Going All The Way 2

I freakin love the "Phantom of the Opera." The movie, that is, and sometimes, to yell you the truth, I feel that I've got a 13 year old Japanese American Princess (JAP) stuck in my soul. Anyway, that was wey weird. 

As I was saying, I love the book, "Phantom of the Opera" and the movie Phantom of the Opera, the old black and white version. I love it when the Phantom dresses like a skeleton and comes to a party. I dress like a skeleton on Saturday and throw my dog Hero off the balcony. He lands on the hedgerows on the ground and walks around the backyard somewhere. 

-Where's Hero?

-Over the Rainbow.

My dad smiles and gets Hero from the backyard. My Dad does not let anyone visit when I dress like a skeleton cause once, I scaried the bonanza out of some rich girl. She's the daughter of some huge corporation that is like 25% of the economy. The father of the girl asked me to apologize. She almost had a heart attack. I went up to the father and hugged him and cried my fucking heart out. I don't even know how I did it or what compelled me to do it. Sometimes, all this emotion fills inside of me like a bathtub and I can't tell who's who and what's what and I feel like giving to God everything that I own which is basically NOTHING except Hero whom I cannot give up. 

Suddenly, concert halls opened up to me and I was doing concerts and it was a freakin sideshow. Me, myself, and I was as happy as I could be. The lights were on me and I played extremely well at first and swam in the adulation. Then I got bored and all my emotions were gone. Suddenly, I had no idea what a composition meant. So I started to listen to Michiko Uchida and Glen Gould and I tried to understand the semiotics of music which is pretty much music which corresponds to its specific context in meaning through symbols and signs. Then I tried to understand the context of Seoul and tried to play it and it all came out overloaded and zigzagged. People did not know what to make of me. I did not know what to make of myself. I was grounded. My father consulted some pychologists. I wanted to talk to a Shaman. My father does not know what to make of me. I think he wanted a mathematical genius. I'm good at mathematics, but I just have no interest in thinking about numbers...