good americans 2

i attend a group fitness class. the people are very helpful, especially women. they encourage me and help me defeat my laziness. i crack silly jokes. i keep it light. the synergy is great in the gym. i know how tough it is for white women at times, even in corporations. they were really brought in for the purposes of cheaper labor, but i know women are masters of synergy, in the home or elsewhere and synergy is the toughest of all habits. things fall apart all the time. the corporation is a platonic unit where each part does its own thing and does not interfere with other parts. the left arm does not know what the right arm is doing.

then i get involved in a conversation with another guy. he's usually someone i try to avoid cause he talks too much. he's a fellow christian. i ask him about his family and kids. he's actually a really nice guy and someone who's not afraid to say Jesus in public. we start talking about asia and the phillipines. his wife is phillipino.

we start talking about coffee news and i like the paper cause it has jokes that i can tell my kids. somehow, we get around to drugs and alcohol. i immediately tell him that i don't like the secularization of christian agenda into politics. the welfare system is a mess. the drug rehabilitation program has the success rate of maybe 1%, is it. these kids are robbing society and their parents blind. i see something deeply wrong with this when they are perhaps a billion people who are starving in the world.

i tell him that they should be thrown in jail, even solitary confinement for a month. he agrees. this is getting ridiculous. anyone who thinks drug users are nonviolent offenders should go to an aa meeting. i've gotten a lot of aa and i have a great sponsor, but the crimes and misdemanors of aa members although i can understand the grace of God, i cannot think that this is justice on any level. at some point, it may be this issue alone which is going to cause a race war. and wars are not conducted with guns and roses these days, wars are now conducted in political correct discussion rooms in which words have different nuances depending on what class, gender, etc.

i don't know why i am so angry these days. i'm really starting to believe that a dictatorship may be the best thing for america. it's like i'm in a star wars movie, a jedi being seduced by the dark sith lord.

the people have voluntarily given up their power to the elite. and the elite have given up their power to impersonal, historical power processes.

deconstructionists in society with a brain are driving their enemies insane. people are losing their minds.

there go the negative thoughts again. actually, it was a very nice conversation i had with him.

actually, even the media seemed to hint at a more dictatorial president by comparing Obama to Lincoln or FDR.

but even my friend here was suggesting a more dictatorial form of government in the US. this diversity is terrifying and creates a paralysis in the culture unless their is synergy.

the kind of sickness that susan sontag or t.s. eliot talked about. overconsciousness. too much going on and too much to know and too much to know about what's appropriate for this culture as opposed to another. sickness. maybe the sickness of the magic mountain of thomas mann.

this could explode the ego and then the unconscious comes in with all the problems of the world that we were only slightly aware of. does individuality really exist or is it a social construct?