A Lost

where are you?
wandering the streets, looking for a home
looking for someone who understands,
looking for someone who loves.

so many days have you spent in the streets,
living under bridges,
after youe husband died
your fell apart.

you left the children somewhere,
you ran and ran and disappeared into the streets
the city lights drunk with the night,
drank the night away
and wondering why it hurt so much
and why you could not change.

so many nights, sleeping with random strangers
for a fee,
forgetting and forgetting and forgetting
until you were filled with the spirit of alcohol
until the softness inside you turns to stone.

where are those hands that care?
why does life seem so meaningless?
Nothing absolute anymore, nothing really important...
taking the kids to school, music lessons, having an occasional affair,
it's all good.

drinking under the full moon
it feels alright
so i sell my body for a living
and live out in nature.

what is there to do?
i stare at the stars and stare at the sky
pissing into a bottle
asking God for meaning, meaning
where nothing is lost...
within.