Highway Part 15

Highway Chapter 12(continued)

Peeling off the wet clothes, I put on dry ones hastily, still chilly from the polar water sticking to my skin. Taking a hair tie from my wrist, I pulled my hair into a ponytail, hoping it would keep the water away. Fuming, I walked back to where he was.

Only stopping to grab my bag, I marched past him, ignoring him. Realizing I didn't quite know the way, I stopped and waited impatiently for him to show up. Once he walked past me, I felt my anger rise again.

“Just so you know, Matthew,” I said his name with a vengeance.

I told him he wasn’t forgiven, and that he was just a guide. He agreed. We walked to the next town, while I gave him the cold shoulder and attempted to ignore every part of his existence. As we walked, I spotted a group of beautiful flowers. I turned to Matt to ask what they were, then remembered my anger for him and crossed my arms instead. He told me what they were regardless. I kept my eyes straight ahead.

The rest of the journey he told me more stories. I tried my hardest to ignore him, but couldn’t help but listen. He told the best stories.

We reached the town, and I realized that I knew this town. We used to come here on field trips in elementary school. This was my favorite place to be when I was younger, for my life had not gone down the drain yet, and I had friends who would accompany me. I had only begun to feel the isolation.

I looked about, remembering my adventures throughout the town. Ice cream there, reading books there, playing tag in that field.

When Matt suggested I do some exploring, I forgot my anger in the rush of elation. I agreed wholeheartedly, and ran off.

“Be nice!” he called from behind.

I put my hand up to show I had heard, and then started to explore.  I went through all of my hotspots of back then, smiling at most of the memories. Kids were playing soccer, and I sat on a nearby bench, watching them play. Their laughter and energy was refreshing, and I laughed lightly.

I imagined myself playing with them, the ball flying towards me before I evaded and took control. I envisioned kicking it down the field with expert footwork and bringing my leg back for the winning goal, sending the ball careening into the net. The other players came to my side, rushing and cheering, lifting me up on their shoulders.

Shaking my head, I reminded myself it didn’t matter now that none of this had happened. A childish fantasy, it was one I often dreamed when I was younger.

I always wanted to be lifted up on someone’s shoulders, but I had never gotten enough interaction with anyone. The students didn’t want to play with me, and I wasn’t encouraged to join any teams. I wasn’t a “role” athlete. 

I looked at my watch and discovered that I had been sitting on the bench for longer than I had expected, and it was now 11:15. I needed to meet Matt back at the gates, and despite being angry at him, I didn’t want to make him worry. I set out on the route back to the gates.

  As I rounded the corner, the sight of people flooded my eyes, there were a few hundred people gathering at what appeared to be a parade. They were swarming the area, and I saw no way through. Not wanting to shove people, I made my way around the thin path that had formed at the edges, having to wait twice while some party goers flounced by. It took me forever to make my way back to Matt, and I could see he was worried before he even saw me.

When I greeted him with an apology, he informed me in a strained voice he had been worried. I looked away from him, telling him about the parade, but worried he was upset. He breathed out a sigh, and then gave me what appeared to be a grateful smile, asking me if I was ready to go. I nodded.

Then, remembering I still had the walkie talkies, I threw one at him, telling him it would keep us in touch. Smiling, he headed towards the direction of the parade.

The crowd had grown even bigger, something I had not thought possible. Something about all of these people made me uncomfortable. Whatever it was made me nervous, and I moved closer to Matt, my shoulders brushing against his. I wasn’t one for affection, but I suddenly felt an instinct instruct me to stay close to him, and I was happy to oblige. He yelled something about going through them, although I could barely hear him over the constant roar of the people. He held out his hand, as what I guessed to be a link attaching us together.

But I wasn’t a child. I didn’t need to hold someone’s hand to get through this., I became embarrassed, and withdrew. I snapped at him I wasn’t a child, and to worry about himself. He told me to stay close. I tried to follow him through the people, but the space was non-existent.

People were moving spastically, and I lost sight of him a few times, being blocked by a person. But when a rush of partiers ran through us, I was swept away by the wave like motion of the crowd. Trying to force my way through, I looked for Matt. He was tall, so I tried to spot him that way.

After a few panicked moments, I managed to spot him. But he was several feet away, and gaining an inch seemed a battle. Using my instinctual desire to my advantage, I ducked in and out of the people, weaving, and shoving when necessary.

He seemed confused, and I guessed he was trying to “sense” me. There were too many people, so he was just looking around. Forcing my way through the people in front of me, I accidently  pushed them away with too much force, slamming into Matt.

He looked at me relieved, and I grabbed his hand with force. I didn’t know if I could find my way if I got lost again.

We finally made it out of the crowd, and I was immensely relieved. I noticed our hands were still attached and, feeling silly, pulled my hand violently out of his.

We started to make our way to the motel, and I asked him more questions. I wasn’t too angry at him anymore, and I loved to hear him talk about nature. I also asked him some silly questions, for it made us both smile.

When we reached the small building, we checked in. we had nothing to do, so while Matt sorted supplies, I took advantage of the television in his room. It was bigger, and I was bored. Watching an old western, I began to think about how similar Matt was to the silent protagonist. When I voiced the opinion to him, he scoffed, comparing me to the boy who had tripped me.

We made fun of the bad acting and plot, enjoying the cool rooms protecting us from the heat. When dinner came, we ate hotdogs from the local vender. I headed upstairs to our rooms, for my feet were still killing me from yesterday, and Matt stayed for another few minutes. 

Just as I was getting ready for a much needed shower, I heard Matt taking one. Irritated he had gone first, I thought about flushing the toilet and scalding him. But I was not that mean, and so I waited around. When he finished, I knocked aggressively on his door, fixing an irate look upon my face. After admonishing him, he told me it was all mine, calling me princess. I growled at him for giving me a nickname, and expressed my displeasure. Then, I told him he could have gone first anyway for it was ladies first, after all. He appeared mildly stung, and I reveled in my victory.

I gathered my sleeping clothes, colorful shorts and a soft t-shirt with a musical score on it, and headed into the bathroom. I turned on the water, the warmth and water pouring down on me blissful. As I scrubbed my hair and body, I reflected on how crazy my world had become.

It had been strange enough without Matt being involved. He was someone I couldn’t even describe. Sometimes he made me so mad I couldn’t stand it, such as this morning and when I can’t get a rise out of him. But then, he also has this uncanny ability to make me happy. I’d known him for two days now, and yet he had already become someone different to me. I didn’t like to think that someone was special enough to change me, but I already felt as if he could. I felt myself becoming less unhappy all the time. Something about this situation was soothing.

Today, in the crowd, I had felt drawn to him, as if he were safe. I thought I didn’t trust anyone, and while I wasn’t telling him all my secrets, I had placed a part of my life in his hands. And he had done only good things with that part. Except for this morning. I didn’t know what was going to happen to this, to us. Now I sound like there even is an us. He had said I would want to leave when I “awakened” as he called it. But could that be true? Could I really be alone again? I had done it for years, but I was growing tired of it.

Telling myself I was thinking too hard, I shut off the water. Taking my brush out, I ripped through my hair savagely, erasing all evidence of tangles.

Becoming bored again, I knocked on Matt’s door. He answered in a high falsetto voice, with an added Okie twang. I stifled a laugh, not wanting to let him know he was funny. I flung open the door in hopes of surprising him, but I ended smacking him in the face. Feeling slightly bad as he held his nose, I retrieved an ice pack for him. Although I wasn’t proud of the accident, it was funny as hell. I apologized in a voice similar to his, speaking of being clumsy. He snorted, and we both laughed.

After that, Matt found a book and was reading, while I watched a singing competition show. When Matt got up for a glass of water, I seized the opportunity to steal his spot on the bed. He came back, and tried to shoo me, but I didn’t budge, and so he moved to the floor. His head was blocking the television, though, so I scooted over to the other half of the bed, allowing him to claim half a side.

I found a documentary on Meerkats, and was now watching it upside down, my legs crossed and leaning on the wall above the headboard. As I grew tired from waking up so early, I thought to mess with Matt one more time before going to bed. I told him I was mad at him still, to which he replied that was a shame for now he couldn’t give me his gift. He had bought me a gift?

“Secrets are bad! Come on, tell me what it is!” I exclaimed.

He refused, and with some more complaints and name calling, he finally gave in. Extracting it from his backpack, he held up what looked to be a stuffed octopus. Not knowing what to say, I was silent. In truth, I thought it was the cutest thing I had ever seen.  For a moment, I thought I should reject it, because I didn’t want to seem childish and vulnerable. But Matt wasn’t judging, and he even seemed worried that I wouldn’t like it. And so, after a second, I gently took the animal from him. It reminded me of the only happy times of my life, and his little content smile brought one of my own to my face.

I thanked Matt, for it truly was something special to me, despite being such a small act. I got up to leave, feeling sleepy, the octopus cradled in my arms, fur puffing out where I held him. Then before I left, I threatened him into silence, for nobody else could know I liked the octopus.

As I lay snuggled in my blankets, the octopus next to my pillow, I felt warm and happy. Matt had found the only thing I was a softy for, and it made me happy. I would cherish the octopus for a long time. Sleep made my eyes heavy, and I began to drift away. I could feel the fluffy tentacles of the octopus brushing against my face, and I smiled. Tonight, instead of bunnies, I would dream of the sea. And in the sea would be my octopus.