Shipwrecked
By Tessa_Hart
Sun, 11 Jul 2010
- 705 reads
3 comments
The morning opens and yearns for me.
Luke warm with love we lie.
I awake with his lips, a new full moon of him.
Teeth brittle like driftwood; a shutter to the tide.
Closed eyes, dams in the emergent morning
silently creates a crater between us on this heavy bed; a raft we share.
We lie on the rocks not touching, no speech.
We wait for the waves to cover us
like a sheet pulled over our bodies.
It is white but the rocks are blackened.
They scrape our spines
but support our flesh.
Deserted, desolate, ship-wrecked bodies.
Naked in our stone smooth skin
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Comments
quite a wonderful piece.
quite a wonderful piece. Though. . . the last line is a trifle flat in comparison. Could have been longer after my taste. I think it is very good.
xx ;)
Pia
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Some lovely imagery, but I
Some lovely imagery, but I agree that it feels a little unfinished. Perhaps a little reworking to make it really great?
J x
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