May And June.

May And June.

Yesterday was Father’s Day I’d booked it off so that I could spend the day with my family, as I think family days are important. In the morning I went to my mum’s place of worship, it was lovely to see her, Meghan came along with me, we had to be there for 10am and as it was far I was determined not to be late, so I was chuffed that I arrived at 9.40am, well before mum.

Usually I’d have bought Paul a gift of Belgium chocolate shells that he loves and a card from the children, but they are now old enough to get their own gifts and card, so I didn’t get him anything. I made sure that I cooked the dinner before I left the house, so that it just needed the finishing touches when we got back home, and because I didn’t have breakfast I know I’d be starving.

On the way back home I went to my local supermarket and got some reduced items for our meals for today and had a small bag of crisp for the short journey home. Back at home I could see that the breakfast things had not been washed up, so I said to Paul, “Couldn’t you have washed up the breakfast things? I did cook the meal,” he shouted back at me, “It’s Father’s Day!” I had for a moment forgotten. And I plucked up the courage and said, “I’m sorry, I’d forgotten.”

Paul was sitting in the Living Room, and said to me, “If Meghan has bought me a gift I won’t accept it!” I said, “Why not?” He said, “Last night after the England match Daisy (our older cat) was purring as she enjoyed sniffing my armpit, (this is something she likes to do about once every three months and only with Paul) and Meghan said, “That’s disgusting!!” As the match had finished just before 1am I’d gone to bed, and this had happened at 2am! That had sounded trivial to me, but Paul did add that Meghan had added some other unprintable words to her dad too!

Five minutes later as we sat in the Living Room Meghan brought in her Father’s Day gift and card, Paul had his arms folded and legs crossed, and Meghan stretched out her hands to him, and said, “This is for you, happy Father’s Day, Paul replied,“ Put it on the table,” Meghan replied, “What the hell, don’t you want it?!! I’ll take it back then!” She left the large card on the coffee table and stormed out the room with the mug still in its box that hadn’t been wrapped, in her hand.

I wasn’t sure what to do, for I could see it from both sides. Paul’s and Meghan’s. Meghan’s for since she was old enough she had always bought Paul a birthday gift and Father’s Day gift too and with her own money, whereas her older brother Daniel has never, ever done this. Meghan had told me later that she wanted to return the gift to the shop today, and that she had never returned anything in her life before, she wanted me to come with her. First I said, I wouldn’t, for she shouldn’t have been horrible to Paul, and then I thought Paul should have took the gift for she is a child, for she didn’t have to buy it and at the time she bought the gift and card, she would have bought it with love, even if her teenage mouth landed her into trouble! So I told her we would go to the shop and return it after school, today Monday. Paul didn’t speak to me all day, for what I’d asked him, so I might as well had been at work and Meghan’s card stayed unopened all day until he had his Tea at 11.30pm last night! Daniel and I had been there when he’d opened the card, and when Paul had left the room, Daniel had picked up the expensive card and said to me, “It’s a really nice card,” I agreed with him, it was a lovely Father Daughter card.  

Today was training day for me, it was First Aid and it was lovely to see and sit by May and June. They sat either side of me, they work in different parts of the country and I hadn’t seen them for a long time, they both looked well, they hadn’t changed a bit since I saw them last.  They are not sisters but work colleagues, and at one time we had all worked together.

During our Lunch break May asked June, how her Mum was, for they hadn’t seen each other for a while either, and June replied, “She is not well, she has dementia, May asked, “Will she get better?” June replied, “No she is getting worse.” June told us that the family had gone out for the day on Saturday and halfway through the day, her mum started to cry and shout that she “Wanted to go home NOW!”  They came home as quickly as they could, and like she had told me the last time I saw her, that with her form of dementia it is a rare form, where deterioration comes quickly! She told us that this week on Thursday they would be having a home help to help them cope. She said it was horrible to see her mum like this, for, “This isn’t her mum.” And May said, “Only those who are in these troubles can understand.” Then June said to May, “And how are you?” Now we all know May has had cancer, and has had operations and had lost her hair through treatments, she replied, “Not good, something is not right, at the moment, I will be going for more test, next week Tuesday. Until this point I’d felt like I was at Wimbledon, watching tennis, turning first to the left and then to the right and back again; then May said to me, “And how is your family?” And I told them about yesterday and how the atmosphere was horrible, and that I wished I’d not bothered and had gone to work! June said, “Meghan mustn’t return the mug, she should still give it to her dad, and really her dad should have taken the gift, for she is a child!” I replied, yes, but the mug will always have that bad reminder of the day attached to it a day that you can’t get back” June replied, “That’s true, so today she can exchange it for a different mug.” I said to them both, “It’s nothing compared to what you two are going through, nothing at all.”  May said, “If something bad was to happen to them, God forbid it does, then they would appreciate each other more” I couldn’t have agreed more. June said, “Encourage Meghan not to return the mug” I said, “I would ask her not to.” Our lives at home had seemed hard and miserable and I said to my two lovely colleagues, that I would remember them in my prayers, and I’d held both their hands briefly as they sat beside me and I said, to them, “Remember us in your prayers too,” they both said they would. At the end of a lovely course, we hugged goodbye and went our separate ways.

Back home I mentioned to Meghan, why not give the mug to Paul today, she replied, “I don’t even want to touch it!” We went to the town, I told her I’d do the talking, she replied, “Good!”

In the shop I said to the sales assistant, “I’d like to return this mug,” she replied, “What’s wrong with it?” I said, “Nothing, my Daughter bought it for her Dad, but he doesn’t want it.” Both sales assistants looked at each other and raised their eyebrows, and I added, “I bet that’s a first”! She said, “Today we could have sold this mug ten times over!”  Meghan had paid cash, so the assistant gave the refund back the same, she hand the money to me and I gave it straight to Meghan, and we left the shop.

Today it remind me to put things in prospective, my life at home is simple and uncomplicated, compared to my friends and colleagues, May and June. X X