Long Grief

No one talks about the many times you’ll rub your fingers over a half scribbled postcard and feel a lump in your throat.

Or whisper ‘Happy Birthday’ to an empty room.

How your eyes sting at a photo you’ve never seen before.  Probably at someone else’s funeral.

And that sudden whim to pull a bottle of perfume from your bedside drawer only to smell the cap. 

Stubbornly holding onto a duvet cover or bath towel until it’s threadbare and then folding it carefully at the back of your airing cupboard.  You’ll now touch it every time you put anything away in there.

Every. Single. Time.

These are the symptoms of long grief.  They are also its only treatment.