Differences.

Differences
It is our differences that make us. We should rejoice in friends who are unique and celebrate the differences that determine us and make us who we are. I have a great friend who is different. He is quiet and reserved; he speaks well and is tall and muscular. I don't know exactly what women look for in a male but I believe, Jock has at least some of the requirements.

Accepting that, it still amazes me that he chose the path he did. I was under the impression in my plukey youth, that all men had the same agenda: A visit to the pub with the mates, a game of something, pool or cards and during this, drink would be consumed, lies would be told and friendships cemented.

Afterwards, if required, some would have a fight, to determine or rearrange the pecking order. Then it was the discotheque or late night venue with a live band. Where it was possible with just the tap of a female's shoulder, to grasp her tightly, and if you were lucky, a quick grope before a rushed sloppy coming together, where body fluids and diseases were exchanged.

If you wanted more, you could try asking the preferred female to stay up with you on the dance floor, to continue the ritual. If this was accepted, the possibility arose of, a long walk home after a cold, embarrassing thrusting of pelvises in a bus stop, or up a close somewhere. There was also the fear of maybe having to 'go the all the way'. No man worth his salt ever admitted to never having done 'it' before, so, any lame excuse was used to disengage.

" Aye. Well, this has been great hen, but A'll huvtae walk yie tae yir hoose noo, A've goat a big gemme the morra and A'm the number one striker. The manager says we've no tae huv sex on the night afore a gemme. A'm awffie sorry, Whit wiz yir name again?"

" It's Senga.- Aye Lover-boy, yie better walk me hame. Let me tell yie by the way, there's mare chance ae you scorin the morra, cos yie were never gonnae score here the night.

Of course the following day in the hostelry, the lie was, you had stayed in her penthouse tenement flat, where all manner of debauchery had taken place. You were extremely tired but were looking forward to more of the same tonight. This is how it is. This was the world I grew up in. Homosexuality only existed in books and sometimes, not often, on the telly. I didn't know any Gay people; I hadn't met any and nobody I knew had either. We lived in an insular world of, day shift, back shift and night shift at the steelworks.

Meeting Jock changed my whole concept of the world and what went on in it. Here was a man who went his own way, a man who disregarded the norm. Not for him the run of the mill life of drudgery. Where work, drink, sleep and work was the way of things.

Not for Jock, the meet girl, marry, have kids and die life. That was what we all had accepted, and indeed, looked forward to. Jock had other ideas. He fancied sheep. The lonely life of the sheep shagger was what appealed to him. Jock when in his cups would, regale me with tales of his escapades and his preferred positions. The 'Close and Tight' position was his favourite. This is where the back legs of the Ewe are trapped in the wellies preventing escape. The sheep is placed facing the lover, with front legs over the shoulders. One has to be fit and supple to perform this. Preparation is all when attempting this rewarding position, Jock says.

You will need, a strong pair of trouser braces. The most reliable and durable braces can be sourced from Army and Navy stores at a reasonable price. If there are no Services Stores near you, an alternative and extremely hardwearing pair, can be obtained at reasonable cost, from Debenhams or Marks and Spencer. The more expensive pair is better, and helps the performance a great deal, as the cheaper variety could snap under pressure.

Attach the short Y of the braces to the front of your trousers. Throw the remainder over your shoulder and clip them at the back of your trousers, or belt preferably. Grab the Ewe, and after trapping her back legs down the wellies, lift her up tenderly and place her front legs over the shoulder. (A light affectionate kiss wouldn't go amiss here, to calm her and help her relax) gently pull the braces round her body, effectively securing her to you and warming you both.

Now, with great care and ensuring to keep the spine straight, bend down, and grabbing both back legs, free them from the wellies. Your ready appendage should have been released prior to grabbing the ewe's legs. Raise them to waist level and slip the legs into the braces, remember to loop the legs into the twisted braces for a firmer grip.

Penetration is now possible and one may use the braces like a bungee chord. When the braces are at their extended limit, a strong upward thrust by the legs will force the braces to spring back quickly, by keeping a close rhythm one may affect an easier and stress free experience. The closer one can get to perpetual motion the better.

There are more positions and helpful hints in Jock's pamphlet. This is available on Amazon, entitled ' Love On The Wild Side'. I myself have tried it only once. Sadly, although the experience was insightful, I don't have the level of fitness required for a long-term relationship.