Result (Inspiration Point)

Cherry

By london_calling79

Sat, 22 Aug 2015
  • 5325 reads
15 comments
 

Work
study
prep
sweat boils down to
black on white.
Pass or fail.
Quantified futures.
 
Best suit
practise
CV
questions lead to
in or out.
Pass or fail.
Mapped futures.
 
Whole month’s wages
permission sought
and gained
all comes down to
yes or no.
Pass or fail.
Planned futures.

Worry
pain
scan
sickness thins to
+ or -.
Pass or fail.
Calculated futures.
 

Whole horizon lines

thin to the spreadsheet

monosyllable.

 

We can play the odds,
move the boundaries,
season the result with a but and an if.

So much behind the printer ink lies, behind the

quantified, mapped, planned, calculated lives.
 
Seconds, minutes, days, weeks, months
and years of sleepless nights
waiting to see on which side
of the bars of the black and white
our futures lie.
 

Certificate PG
Poem
New Set
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)

Comments

Submitted by london_calling79 on

Feel free to criticize. Or just give a grade and say, 'Must do better.'

 

Submitted by Bee on

I don't want to criticize this - only say I liked it and the fast pace works really well for the subject. Very good. 

Bee

Submitted by london_calling79 on

Thanks Bee! Glad you liked it.

 

Submitted by Deliberately Ev... on

A 

great effort - enjoyed the pace and structure. I look forward to your next assignment.

The beat of your heart is the mellifluent rhythm to my soul.

Submitted by london_calling79 on

No pressure then! Thanks Accidently...

 

Submitted by Mark Say on

Agree with A on this: pace and structure are perfect and it does a great job at conveying the anxiety attached to cold judgements passed by others. We all know this is a world full of grey areas and nuance, but often we're judged on black and white assessments. Well done.

 

Submitted by london_calling79 on

Spot on in your assessment of theme. Thank you for your kind words on its construction too.

 

Submitted by scratch on

A*

 

Submitted by london_calling79 on

That's a first for me! Cheers teach!

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

I can't see the connection with Poetry Monthly in this? Obviously it is IP, but is psychogeography coming in? Am I being blind? Rhiannon

 

Submitted by london_calling79 on

Don't worry, Rhiannon, you're not going mad! It's written in response to scratch's new Poetry Monthly theme of - 'Result/s'.

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Are you sure that's a Poetry Monthly ? I thought it was just the weekly Inspiration Point, but you may be right. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by london_calling79 on

Nope - you're right! I'll change the title. Sorry Rhiannon!

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

You draw that moment of focus on results so well,the anxiety attached to 'the mapped life' is palpable. Thankfully reality is more flexible, but they won't know that until their lives go off route. In the spirit of marks to come: 9 (Why don't they just go up to 10?)

Submitted by london_calling79 on

Thank you Phillip, I know you will have felt the bittersweetness of it all too. Wanting those who've done well to be happy but prepared for greater challenges in the future and consoling those who haven't done so well that it's not the end of the world. I think they will go up to ten in the near future but considering that 7,8 and 9 are all equivalent to A/*/** what will ten be? A***?