iCrush/Crash

iCrush/Crash

i lost my virginity

on the back seat of jason rider’s

mini cooper

he was a right tosser

so these days i fantasise

it had been

with johnny depp

then

on the m25 i lost

my no claims bonus

going bumper to bumper

with ewan mc gregor

i think i may have left 

a few scratches behind

although the buff bodywork

looked undamaged

at the wheel

on the road to mandalay

i closed my eyes

dreaming 

of having james mc avoy’s

phone number

calling him and calling him

but he never rung back

i was so ditched

from now on i’m only driving

automatics

manual gear sticks

are such a distraction