Bridge Over Troubled Water (Dead Reckoning series - Part 25)

Continued from Episode 23 (The Jean Genie)

The story so far:   Josiah, having rekindled a romance (on the rebound from Samantha Knight) with an old flame, Jeanette DeVille, has apparently disappeared since his supper with her, at Evanley Hall, last Saturday.  Samantha persuaded Archibald to go to the Hall to find out what had happened, on the pretext of visiting his girlfriend, Precious, but now Archibald has also failed to return.  Now that the Detectives know that Jeanette, Precious and her driver, Hames are probably connected with a series of jewellery robberies, they and Samantha have gone to investigate.  In the process, they have discovered Jeannie, the mad woman in the cottage by the Hall, tied up and left to die.  Meanwhile, in the cellar of Evanley Hall, Josiah and Archibald are in deep water, and getting deeper, which is a problem for Josiah, who is somewhat shorter!:

D.I. Wood leaned against the car, drawing heavily on a cigarette and easing the weight from his troublesome foot.  Samantha paced up and down, muttering to herself and looking grim.  D.S. Stone appeared from within the cottage, closely followed by Jeannie, who was trying to contain an Escape Committee of cats.

“Sir, I have some news from the APNR” D.S. Stone announced, looking rather smug.

“Oh, well done, Stoney!  You managed to track down the reg. then?”

“Only ‘cause he asked me, didn’t ‘e?” Jeannie cackled, “Get back in there, yer buggers!” She yelled at her escaping cats.

“Is that right, Sergeant?” D.I. Wood looked at his subordinate, quizzically.

“The erm…lady did have some pertinent information” D.S. Stone agreed, coyly.

“Ok, so what have you got?”

“Well, I think we can safely assume that they’re not taking Mr. Oakshott and his colleague, back home,” D.S. Stone explained, “they were tracked heading north.”

“Right, get the Traffic lads onto them, pronto!”

“Ah, well, unfortunately, we’ve lost them, at the moment” D.S. Stone said, sheepishly.

“Then we need to get up to the Hall!” Samantha exclaimed, “If they’re not taking them home, they must have left them there”

D.I. Wood shifted his stance on the car, uneasily.

“I’m not sure we’ve really got probable cause to break into somewhere like Evanley Hall”

“What more do you need?  Josiah and Archibald are missing and the perpetrators have done a bunk!” Samantha folded her arms and glared at the Inspector.

“Well…” D.I. Wood looked distinctly uncomfortable, as he considered how his superiors might react to him breaking into a stately home.

“Perhaps Mrs. Knight and I could just have a look around the outside of the House?”  D.S. Stone suggested, diplomatically.

“Yes, all right, no harm in that, I suppose” D.I. Wood drew on his cigarette, thoughtfully, “But don’t go getting all ‘Sweeney; on me, ok?  Take a careful look and report back, yes?”

“Indeed, sir” D.S. Stone nodded and indicated to Samantha to follow him up the drive.

“Bloody waste of time!” D.I. Wood grumbled, rubbing his troublesome leg.

“That playin’ yer up?” Jeannie nodded toward his leg.

“Thank you, ma’am, yes” D.I. Wood winced.

“Want me to tek a look?” Jeannie cocked her head.

“I am not a cat, madam!” D.I. Wood drew himself up.

“Suit yersel’, only I know me stuff e’en if you dunner” Jeannie sniffed and turned to head back into the cottage, “wossit s’posed to be then?” She turned and asked.

“Gout!”

“Gerroff!” Jeannie chuckled, “betcher it inna.”

“You don’t think so?”  D.I. Wood couldn’t help being intrigued.

“Nah, never gout!” Jeannie shook her head, “come back in ‘ere, let’s ‘ave a butcher’s”

* * * *

Samantha and D.S. Stone began working there way around the Hall, starting with the main doors, which were unsurprisingly locked and bolted, they made their way to the left, edging around by the kitchen and back door (also locked and bolted).

“Josiah! Archibald!” Samantha shouted, aware that it sounded like she was trying to find a lost pet.

“I can’t hear anything, I’m sorry Mrs. Knight” D.S. Stone looked glum.

“They’ve got be be here, somewhere!” Samantha shook her head, “hang on, can you hear running water?”

D.S. Stone stood, silently, and concentrated.

“Yes…” He answered, eventually, “I think I can!”

* * * *

Archibald, with immense effort, had finally got his chair within spitting distance of Josiah’s.  He realised he had seriously underestimated how difficult it would be to move a chair against the weight of water surrounding them.

“Mr. O., are you ok?”  He asked.

“It’th pfft, it’th getting clothe now, Archibald” Josiah sputtered.  Archibald could see that the water was now up to his employer’s mouth and nose.

“Hang on, Mr. O., I’m coming!” Archibald made another tremendous effort to move his chair, closer.

“I told you not pfft to!” Josiah attempted to snap.

“Yeah, well…” Archibald grunted, as he finally managed to get his chair next to Josiah’s.

“Look, pfft [glug], thith ith it pfft [glug] I can’t…hang on, much longer.  I jutht want to thay pfft, pffble, thank you, Archie!” Josiah’s head disappeared beneath the water.

“No, you bloody don’t!” Archibald shrieked.

* * * *

“Where’s it coming from?” Samantha looked around, anxiously.

“I don’t know” D.S. Stone shook his head, “hold on!  There’s a sort of window down there, at ground level” D.S. Stone crouched down to look, Samantha joined him and peered over his shoulder.

“Can you see anything?”  She asked.

“No, not really” D.S. Stone frowned and attempted to rub the ancient bullseye glass, clear, “it’s very dirty, you can’t see a thing, but I’m sure the water noise is louder down here”

 Samantha cocked her ear and concentrated.

“You’re right!  Are you sure you can’t see anything?”

“No, it’s…oh, hold on, I think I can see water!” D.S. Stone virtually had his nose to the glass.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this” Samantha said, darkly.

* * * *

Archibald took a very deep breath indeed and plunged his head beneath the icy water.  Here it was very murky, but he could just make out Josiah’s figure to his right.  Using all of his strength, he forced his head underneath the crook of Josiah’s left arm, then, gathering all of his remaining strength, he forced himself upwards.  Moments later, both Josiah and Archibald’s heads were above the water, just!

“Aagh, pfft, oosh” Josiah gasped for breath, unexpectedly finding himself again above water, “wha…wha’th happenin’?  Arch pfft, wha’ are you doin’?”

“Pfft, getting us another couple of minutes” Archibald spluttered, “now, SHOUT!”

“Thowt what?

“One…two ..three HELP!!” They both yelled.

* * * *

“Did you hear that?” Samantha took a step back, in surprise.

“I certainly did, miss” D.S. Stone nodded.

“Is that your ‘probable cause’?” She raised an eyebrow.

“Yes, I think it is” D.S. Stone agreed, glumly, eyeing the definitely robust nature of the kitchen door.

“There’s a window?” Samantha suggested, noting his reluctance.

“So there is!” D.S. Stone grinned and went in search of a suitable stone.

* * * *

“’s not gout!” Jeannie pronounced, prodding D.I. Wood’s reluctant foot.

“That’s what they said it was, down at the hospital” D.I. Wood winced.

“Nah, infection…or summat like that, you mark my words” Jeannie marched off to a shelf at the back of the kitchen and rooted around amongst some jars, “Ah, here y’are!”

She returned clutching a jar containing something grey and dubious.

“Slap some of that on, couple times a day” She shoved the jar into D.I. Wood’s hands.  He looked at it, suspiciously.  There was the sound of smashing glass.

“Oh my god!  What’s he doing?”  D.I. Wood leapt up, and immediately regretted it, “The Chief Constable’ll have my bits for cufflinks!”

“Getting’ inter the ‘all, are they?  Good on ‘em!” Jeannie chuckled.

* * * *

“HELP!!” Josiah and Archibald yelled, between splutterings.

Above the rushing water, there was the distinct sound of smashing glass.

“Did you pfft, hear that, Mr. O.?” 

“Wath it pfft, wath it glath?” Josiah managed as he struggled to keep above the water.

“Reckon…so” Archibald was finding talking and holding Josiah up, a bit more than he could manage.

“We thould pfft try again.  Ready 1 – 2- 3” Josiah prompted.

“HELP!!” They yelled in unison.

“Hang on pfft can you hear that?  Archibald asked.

“Hear…what?”

“The water pfft, it’s stopped!”

“Tho it hath!” Josiah said, with a faint trace of hope, “mutht pfft be thome thort of thtopcock!  Good old Thepherd!”

“That’s great…Mr. O.” Archibald grunted, “only, there’s one pfft problem”

“What’th that?”

“I don’t think I can keep holding you pfft…” Archibald gasped for breath and pushed up as hard as he could, “…up, much longer!”

There's a lot more from my Undertakers at https://mybook.to/Undertakers

Now read Part 26