So; this is my life then&;#063;

So;this is my life then?

The sun beat down, upon the lone figure standing at the edge of the
clifftop. It was a
glorious day, the kind of day that makes you feel glad to be alive, but
Ken didn't feel glad
to be alive. "So this is my life then ....." he was thinking "Not much
of a life is it? Get up,
do a days graft, go home get nagged at by the missus, robbed blind by
the kids, and for
what? Not one little bit of gratitude do they show. Not one bit"

Ken was contemplating suicide, but he'd never commited suicide before
and was still
weighing up all the ramifications, like for instance. How much will it
hurt? And how cold
will the water be? And how should one do it, head first or feet first.
Or; should he just say
"To hell with it" and have an affair with the cute little thing from
across the green instead,
but then, if he took that option and the missus found out she'd hurt
him a damn sight more
than any suicide would.

It was thursday, He wondered if thursday was a good day to kill
yourself, or would maybe
tuesday be a better day. By thursday he'd already paid the milkman. If
he died on a
tuesday it would save him ?2:66. His legs were beginning to ache so he
sat and dangled
them over the cliff, while he smoked a `cig. On the other hand, he
thought. The lads will
all be going down the pub on friday, and then to the nightclub on
saturday ...so maybe he
would be better leaving it until sunday to kill himself. Oh no he
couldn't possibly die on
sunday. Well not until after the match anyway. Liverpool are playing
Arsenal in the cup.

So monday? Yes. He decided, monday was the ideal day to commit
hari-kari. But then
again, monday night was poker night with the lads.Tuesday was Top Gear
on tele.
wednesday was the mid-week "Just a couple of pints dear" down the
local with the rugby
team. Which brought him back to .....thursday! What a life eh? Can't
even find a decent
day to kill yourself. He shook his head sadly.

After much morose head shaking, he put his hand down his pants and
scratched his balls,
as he wondered if his wife would cope with the loss of him. Okay, Okay
so yes the kids
did wonder who he was when he came home early because the match had
been canceled
last week. But they'd miss him ...wouldn't they?

Right, he made his decision. "Today's the day"

With one last backward glance, Ken stood up, took a couple of steps
back; and threw
himself off the cliff.

Just at that moment his drinking cronies came running towards
him.

"Oh look. There's Ken the Lemming" Said Bill the Lemming. "He's just
Jumped off the
Cliff . I'm going to do that too"

"Me too" said Tim the Lemming
.
"And me" said Rod the Lemming

"Me too" said Bob the Lemming.

And on a sunny thursday afternoon, they all ran over, and one by one,
jumped off the
Cliff!