pregnant pause

7th may 2003

curling up
doesn't take it away
awake in the morning
the same everyday
its not to get used to
just have to wait
the ticking of a clock,
louder for my sake?

its as though i'm sat watching
as though its not me
and although i feel no guilt
thoughts attack my mind so easily
just a few more days
the count down so slow
i'm dizzy and weak
and scared its already beginning to show

i toss and i turn in my sleep through the night
wake up in the dark,i wait for the light
alone with my thoughts
lost in my own bed
i aim to be positive
but keep thinking instead