Rich Pickins

There's a man I know
who could have any girl he chooses
he never makes a fool of himself
no matter how much he boozes

So if you're in a happy relationship
I wouldn't count your chickens
because your girll may well be stolen
by my old friend Rich Pickins

Everyone who knows him
is just at a loss
at how he is continually surrounded
by girls who look like Kate Moss

We don't know how he does it
it seems to be pure luck
that he'll walk into a bar alone
and leave with Kelly Brooke

It's not that I'm jealous
but I can't really get over
how last time I saw him he was with a girl
prettier than Anna Kournikova

I just worry about you
my good friend Rich Pickins
don't you ever yearn to stay in one night
and read something by Charles Dickens?

I know that once you were with a lapdancer
who ended up putting money down your pants
but Richey Rich don't you ever stay at home
watering your plants?

Oh Richey Richey please teach me
I have so much to learn
Oh Richey I'm so jealous of your suits
and how much money you earn.

Oh Rick Pickins you can have whoever you want
life is a Microsoft Word document and you get to chose the font.