Did you have a sexy sleep?

‘Did you have a sexy sleep?’ he enthused down the phone.

‘No, I don’t think I had any dreams actually. Just a restful sleep.’ I replied whilst trying to simultaneously pull some socks on and apply mascara….trickier than it sounds, I wouldn’t advise it.

‘Oh. So no sexy dreams then?’

‘No, I just slept well.’ We have one sock on, but the other starts migrating across the room in early morning defiance.

‘Oh’ he retorts. ‘Well you should have more sexy dreams.’ Was that an order, a request, a plea? A pause, you can almost hear the next question coming.

‘Was I in your dream?’ Every time Freddie does this I sit very still and think, did he actually listen to anything I just told him. The mascara is on, and staying well, by the way.

In my most sympathetic tone ‘I just said…I don’t remember having any dreams.’ Another pause. ‘You should have some sexy dreams, ones with Freddie in them, all naked and writhing and oiled up. That’d be a sexy thought…’

Exasperated, ‘Yes.’

‘So. What are your sexy plans for the day?’ he tried, another sexy tangent in the conversation.
‘I’m just getting ready, then work, then home, food and bed probably. Nothing exciting. What about you?’

‘Well pretty much the same, work, then some study provided I can sneak off early enough and then beddy byes.’

‘Awesome, sounds like a plan’ as makeup starts being throw in the general direction of the make-up bag, whether it gets there or not is kind of a bonus.

‘So where are you today?’ as another item misses and clunks as it collides with the mirror.

‘Just in the office’ clink ‘then possibly some client stuff’ clink, ‘and then back to the flat’ and the last piece goes in, a result as far as my morning goes.

‘Excellent.’ I say, optimistically oozing early morning positivity.

‘So’ Freddie muses on in his own world of morning routines, ‘did you have a sexy sleep?’