how far will we bend

words come easier to me,written.rather than spoken
maybe that makes me a little silly,
maybe it does.
i want to show you an explanation for my ways,
as if that would make everything better.
it wouldn't.
this like all else.i am far too aware of.
if you were to accept these habitual,nonsensical whimsies of mine
i would carry on with my all knowing ignorance.
and eventually,we would part.
i don't know,how.how to stop biting my tongue.
keeping the peace.must i rock the boat.
must i be the one?
there is something in you,
something that urges me on
more than what mere logic can decipher.
i know,how you like your logic
this person who i am,i want to be comfortably
with you
but this irresistible need to protect myself
has me battening down the hatches,as though preparing for a storm
i'm fearful,of what i cannot control.of loss
if i keep myself at the verge,i will neither gain,nor lose
worse maybe,i will lose
without ever having had you.
i feel a fool,the way i splutter like a child.