A V.I.H.

If you have a moment to spare in your busy day and you want to know what a V.I.H. is, I will explain. A V.I.H. is a very intelligent hen. I am a mover and a shaker in the hen's world at least in my hen's world. Probably THE mover and shaker! My name is Prunella because of my great appetite for the over ripe plums that fall off the plum tree in our garden. I make sure that I get my full share. I have dark brown feathers that gleam in the sun. Some would call me fat but I call myself well-covered. I have five sisters. We all hatched from the same clutch of eggs so we all look alike, but when it comes to brains I seem to have everybody else's. You can see how clever I am just by looking into my brown, beady eyes. My sisters and I are lorded over by a large and arrogant cock. He thinks he's the greatest but I know different. He's dumb!

We spend our nights in a well-appointed hen house with comfortable perches, nesting boxes filled with straw, a drinking fountain designed for hens and copious amounts of chicken feed. Our days are spent in a large garden filled with all sorts of interesting features if you are a hen whose days are filled with searching and scratching for edible morsels. But, as they say, the other hen's grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, and I found mine next door.

A family of cats live in the house next door. They are sleek, well-fed and lazy as they sleep all day draped on the roof when it is fine, under cover when it rains. What they get up to at night is no concern of mine. Their owners, out at work all day, worried that their felines might get hungry in their absence, provided a little house for them with a proper roof and even a piece of carpet on the floor for them to sit on. I ask you. Whatever next!? But I must not stray from my story. Dishes of assorted cat foods were left in this little house for them. I discovered this one day when I walked along the fence that separates the two gardens. The little house is just the other side of this fence. Not that I was hungry but the food looked delicious. I admit I was tempted but how to succumb? I put my famous brains into overdrive. I noticed that halfway along the fence was a small gate and under the gate the earth had subsided leaving a space that could be made into a hole. For several days I concentrated my scratching efforts on that patch of earth and gradually made the hole bigger, big enough for me to slip under the gate and into next door's garden. I made for the little house keeping watch in case the cats saw me. One never knew, cats can be unpredictable when faced with creatures covered with feathers! I got there safely and sampled all the delights. I was just about to help myself to seconds when I heard the cock crow. It must be bed-time and he does get himself in a state if he can't round us all up. I thought I'd better get going. I went back to the hole and started to ease myself through and got stuck. I tried going forward, it didn't work so I I tried going back but it made things worse. I wriggled and squiggled and tried to make myself smaller but with all those feathers it's impossible.I tried again and again but I was completely wedged. The cock was going frantic, he'd failed in his job to get us back home safely. I joined in his cries and the noise brought our owner running to the scene.He took one look at me and burst out laughing. I couldn't see what was funny about my plight. It took him quite a while to free me and I felt battered and bruised when I emerged from my predicament. He told me off. The cock told me off. My sisters all laughed at me but as I settled down on my perch for the night I was proud of my adventure. I might make that hole bigger and try again another day.