Disco Dave

Saturday evening, out on the pull, Disco Dave has got it all
He’s got the strides, got the shoes, got the shirt and got the balls
To sweep into ladyland on a wave of cologne
One thing is certain, tonight Disco Dave will not be alone

He strides down his local to meet Pikey Phil
Two pints and a buzzer and he’s starting to chill
To the Gun they amble sizzling with belief
Disco Dave has the hair, the smile, the teeth

In the Gun Dave and Phil sup, smile and front
They wait for Jezza, “He’s late” “Lazy cunt”
A pill in the gents, a lager, a whisky
Dave’s getting impatient and Phil’s feeling frisky

Dave and Phil are fed up, they move onto the Slug
A waz and a whizz, then more pints to glug
Dave spies a target while he’s waiting for Jezza
Two minutes later “Well?” says Phil, says Dave “Lezzer”

Jezza arrives and they move to the Bricklayers
Dave’s in his element, here they are players
Dancing and smiling and working the room
Dave needs some fresh flesh to lighten the gloom

Blonde, blonde, blonde, he thinks, go for the dumb
Poor, stupid, smelly, who cares, just as long as I come
Gets knocked back by Leigh, Jane calls him a minger
Dave switches tactics, ‘anything but ginger’

Beer in the tavern and Whisky in Browns
The birds are getting less fussy as the wine slips on down
He sees a pair and goes for the snog
Phil gets her mate, the fat ginger dog

The music, the moves, Dave knows this girl loves dick
He’s tonguing and groping, then the hot girl feels sick
She runs for the ladies holding her tum
Dave needs a catch as its well after one

Dave’s in the disco and looks good on the floor
He’s had a grope and a snog and he’s looking for more
He undoes his shirt and really gets down
Grabs a blonde, gets a slap and a withering “clown”

Then he hits gold, Alice is tall, dark and hot
He gives her the works, all the best moves his got
He dances slowly around her, slips his hands round her waist
Whispers “hi babe” softly, and knows she has the taste

For a night of hot sex, the wonders of Dave
He can see in her eyes that its cock that she craves
Tonight is the jackpot, they go out for a cab
Snog on the way and skip the kebab

He’s dreaming of conquest, he cannot wait to get
Her on his satin sheets, her naked, her wet
Tonight won’t require cash, rohypnol or candles
He’s got all the hot gash, all the sex he can handle

Back in her bedroom, she just wants to dance
Dave puts her straight, guides her onto his love lance
She steps back and smiles “I knew it was you…
Lie down naked, I know just what to do”

She leaves with a giggle and Dave gets undressed
This girl knows whats what, she can see he’s the best
The girl returns with a smile, handcuffs and rope
“I want to tie you up, you’re not nervous, I hope”

“As long as I fuck you babe, I don’t really care”
replies our hero as he laid back and stared
as the girl stripped slowly, she reached under the bed
runs her nails over Dave’s chest, smiled and said…

Her nails scratched lower “Do you remember Susie Brock?”
Dave shook his head and grinned as her nails reached his cock
“You doped her and raped her… you ruined her life”
She gripped his cock hard, then showed him the knife

Dave struggled and thrashed, but her knots were too tight
He bucked and screamed and hoped that she might
Just be teasing to see if he were afraid
Then he felt the cold whisper, the slice of the blade

There wasn’t much pain, just the cold rush, then blood
It squirted and pulsed and rushed out of him in a flood
She giggled as it came free and placed it on his chest
This was no S&M, this was no sort of test

Dave shuddered and whimpered and felt very cold
His life did not flash before him as he had been told
The last thing he heard before he started to go
Was the girl lean and whisper “You reap what you sow”