Zen and the art of getting free Guinness
By grandaddy
- 283 reads
“What do you reckon, money the root of all evil?”
“The love of money is the root of all evil.” Replied Pete
“So capitalism is to blame.” Said Barney.
And as it was the two twenty somethings were putting the world to rights sitting in a pub in Soho on the winter Sunday afternoon, trying to fend off the inevitable return to work the following morning.
“Look at it this way, fundamentally you need money for everything, even people who don’t relish money, need it, even on benefits, people cheat the system to get more of it, and those who work for whatever reason, a sense of ambition, social responsibility, greed, necessity or whatever, only really do it for money.”
“What about volunteers?”
“They do that because they can afford to or because it gives them a sense of worth that employers recognise and award with money.”
“Do you want another Guinness?”
“Yer, go on then.” Replied Pete. Barney got up and went to the bar, after a few minutes he came back with two pints of Guinness.
“Anyway,” Continued Pete “what I’m saying is that, well it’s the Zen thing, money ends up owning and controlling you, everything we do is controlled by money, if an alien came down and observed us, they would think money was the Lord and Master and we were the servant race. Ferrying it around due its lack of the need for its own mobility. They would think we did this for money in exchange for money rewarding us with goods, only to increase our need and dependence on money.”
“So this master race of money then makes alliances with members of the human race giving them power, money then protects these individuals by surrounding them with more of their own race, who defends them from other members of the servant race who do not carry as much favour as the powerful rich.”
“So what’s the answer?”
“We need to overthrow the master race release ourselves from the slavery.”
“hmmm, how many of these Guinnesses have we had now?”
“This is the seventh.”
“OK, how do we break the chains”
“The problem is the collaborators.”
“The ones surrounded by the master race.”
“Yes, the other thing is it’s got to be global, barter is not the answer either, bartering goods is just allowing the master race to exist in disguise.”
“Communism?”
“No, although globally that would be an improvement, if the master race could be eliminated, but it wouldn’t, they would exist in their disguised form as barter.”
“So what you are saying is the removal of the need for trade, that trade feeds the master race.”
“Yes, trade is the master races food, they thrive off it.”
“So to end our servitude we have to starve the master race, but without trade how would we survive?”
“What is trade?”
“The exchange goods and materials that are deemed necessary for the servant race to survive.”
“So, how would we survive without it?”
“Don’t exchange them.”
“What, just have them.”
“How do we get them?”
“We have the technology for everyone to have what they need now.”
“How would they get them though?”
“By having access to them.”
“Give me an example.”
“None exists, that how much the master race controls everything, we can’t even conceive of an existence without them. Take this Guinness, you want another one?”
“Yes, OK”
“Well you can’t, not without the permission of the master race.”
“Jesus, I hate the master race, I want a Guinness.”
“Exactly, so why would the servant race make Guinness without getting the recognition of the master race.”
“It wouldn’t, but people still want a Guinness.”
“So why wouldn’t we still make it.”
“Because people only do things for recognition.”
“Why.”
“Because there is no such thing as altruism.”
“So the problem really is the lack of the servant races ability to be altruistic.”
“Everything can be learned, but yes, I would say that we either continue to be the servant race or learn to be altruistic.”
“Are you going to buy yourself another Guinness,”
“No, that would make me a servant.”
“Only for the time being, think altruism.”
“I could buy you a Guinness.”
“Precisely.”
“Then you could buy me one.”
“That wouldn’t be altruistic and you are already stumbling back to the food of the master race, barter and trade”
“Alright, I will buy you a Guinness?”
“Love one, cheers mate”.
As Barney stood at the bar, Pete thought to himself, once a servant always a servant.
- Log in to post comments