TRAGIC NOSTALGIC

HOMEWORK EXCUSES

I was silly and sixteen
I committed a heinous crime
Oh, lord oh lord -
My homework was never on time

And once miss said:
"Boy is there sense in that silly head?"
Oh, yes I do have a brain a billion uses - but I only ever use it for my homework excuses

And so! -

My grandmother died twice
And my sister cried -
Next-door neighbour lost his wife
My dog ate it - my dad used it
I won't tell you what for . . .

The truth is -
I just couldn't be bothered
I really couldn't be bothered

I was cheeky and I was chubby
I committed an evil offence
Oh, gee oh, Jesus -
Let the classroom trials commence

My grandmother died twice
And my sister cried -
Next-door neighbour lost his wife
My dog ate it - my dad used it
I won't tell you what for . . .

The truth is -
I just couldn't be bothered
I really couldn't be bothered

So the next day at the trial
Setting out to beguile
I winked at the jury
And made them smile

I gave my reasons
They gave me lines
Writing down those excuses
A million times

And so! -

My grandmother died twice
And my sister cried -
Next-door neighbour took his life
My dog ate it - my dad used it
I won't tell you what for . . .

The truth is -
I just couldn't be bothered
I really couldn't be bothered

And one day Sir, said:
"Mess with the bull, son and you will get the horn. If you respect me, I won't respect you. That's the way this thing works."

And so -

Your wife cheated on you twice
And Sir I saw you cry
It was your next door neighbours wife
She took it - and so did you
And so she went back for more

" why you little s . . . "
Shut up Sir - because

Your wife cheated on you twice
And Sir I saw you cry
It was your brother in disguise
He gave her it - and you took it
And so she went back for more

Homework is such a chore
And being young is too much fun
Being young was too much fun
Being young was too much fun

FAT LAZY LIES

Swallow swallow swallow down your lies
Swallow down your fat lazy lies
Your excuses are an art
a wake up call -
a kick up the arse

Mirror mirror was on the wall
Broken pieces now - warts and all

You can't stand to see what you have done, what you've become - so just dim the lights and run

Swallow swallow swallow down your lies
Swallow down your fat lazy lies
Your excuses are an art
a wake up call -
a kick up the arse

Mirror mirror was on the wall
Broken pieces - warts
Ive seen them all

You can't stand to see the Damage Done - So just wear opaque - and feed the delusion - for gods sake!

Swallow swallow swallow down your lies
Swallow down your fat lazy lies
Your excuses are a farce
a wake up call -
a kick up the arse

And you can't stand to look again my friend - but don't pretend everything's okay
It's the worst mistake
You repeatedly make
The worst mistake
You choose to make

Just accept and move on and try to change all those thoughts and feelings that make you feel so deranged

You should confide but instead
You just lie and open wide
Swallow swallow swallow
Down your lies
Your worst enemy is you
Love thine own self
And just be true