Scurvy

 

The busty pirate lady put down the lemon, closed the curtains and answered the phone.

 

"Yes?... Well I was just torturing someone for information, but carry on... Yes, you can put rat's tails in the microwave... Of course you need to take them off the skewer first!... Not tonight, I'm busy... Yes, torturing, weren't you listening?!... I'll send a text... It'll take as long as it takes!... Love you too, bye..."

 

She put down the phone.

 

"Bloody idiot... now where were we?"