How Wicked Am I

how wicked am i, how I do what I want,

how I condescend, lie

trying to make myself feel better,

eating sweets to erase pain with pleasure,

living a mindless life,

keeping mindlessly busy.

how have I become this way, I who despised

the hypocrisies of the rich and beautiful,

now becoming

just what i despised.

so much hate,

so much violence within me,

a desire for a better world,

but not knowing how to get there,

wanting to be a better person

yet stuck in a world of infinite...

lord restore me, make me whole

plant within me your vision and your end,

let me sacrifice my everyday life for you

and do something real.