A Priori
By Alice Evermore
- 1719 reads
her own room was scented with lavender
and beeswax
vibrating with a delicate fervour
this room was where her many possible selves
aligned into an single creature
illuminated by sun or moon
this room was subject to its own relativity
allowing her thoughts to somersault endlessly
through the flush airspace
of a zero hour
this room was untroubled
her refuge from all that stormed
beyond its walls
*
in time she moved
far away
travelling
forwards
backwards
starboard
and port
ascending and descending
along longitudes and latitudes
that stretched by degrees and minutes
across the mantle of the onrushing moment
*
out there
behind the horizon
she discovered many rooms
rooms glimpsed
through luminous windows
past tall archways
from doors left ajar…
rooms she visited
with curiosity
expectation
elation
indecision
and dread
*
in some of the rooms the air was cool and sweet
other rooms were close and warm
bodies pressed past one another
in an polyhedral dance of limbs
and fabrics
voices buzzed north and south
eyes glanced east and west
skin blushed against skin
a lone wasp drifted near the chandelier
*
when she slept
she found herself
in rooms of ambiguous dimensions
shadowed antechambers
elaborate halls
rooms from centuries ago
rooms she had seen
without a cornea
an iris
or a retina
*
after a while
it was difficult to determine which rooms had been
real
and which had been invented
the catalogue of times and places she carried inside
was a disarranged opus
of truths and wishes
an improvised reconciliation with reality
bare
and unpredictable
like the room she was in
at this very moment…
*
was it scented with lavender?
was it untroubled?
turning towards the dark figure in the corner
she said,
“Each day I find myself balancing upon the tip
of a magnetic needle…
veering for equilibrium…
amid the flurries…
and I wonder…
if I were to fall…
would you catch me?”
*
but the dark figure had vanished
and she was suddenly alone
sealed inside the only room
she had ever truly occupied…
a room so small
one could cradle it in the palm of their hand
for an instant she felt trapped
smothered by the claustrophobia
of her own self-awareness
so to expel her impermanence
she shut her eyes
*
now in darkness
she was safe
for all that remained in this room
was her intuition
it had no shape, scent or colour
but it was there
tethered to her decisions
like a phantom sibling
no matter where she went
or what events might befall her
this silent whisper would be with her
echoing from rooms she was unable to know
deep inside the abstract architecture
of her sentience
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Comments
First time for me in reading
First time for me in reading your tales AE. I did learn the meaning of "...sentience..."
ps Can I suggest you condense ( only a suggestion)the text with less line breaks. For me it makes for easier read
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