New Inventions! (Maybe The Past Was Better?) by Mr A.N.Muggins

New Inventions, New Inventions!

Coming out of my hair,

Up my nose,

And aching in my brain.

I long for the good old days,

When everything was simple,

And Henry VIII still sat on the throne.

Take away my mobile banking app,

And the kids’ computer games boxes.

Switch off the internet and suspend Facebook,

And let’s go back to basics.

Sound dictation of everyone’s religion,

And work in the fields,

Or serving the rich folks in their Manor Houses?

Covet the costumes of the rich men and their wives,

But the Sumptuary Laws will keep you in your place.

300 years or more to wait for the vote if you’re a man,

And even longer if you’re a woman!

(And even then you might just get what you deserve,

A Mrs Thatcher or a budget slasher!)