Inspired by “The Fall” by penandpaperdreams

You are the object of all of my affection. You have stolen from me even the stars' attention. I have come to love you in the way that all lovers do, without question. I have come to adore even the faults in you. I have come to be less so I could be more for you. I have aimed at consuming your attention, to learn of your passions and improve my disposition. I have come to the point of no return; I can no longer relearn how to doubt that this is what I feel and you are all that it is all about.

You have treaded into my life and left footprints leading all the way up to my heart. I don’t know how to be rational anymore. I don’t know how to look at this logically, not like before. I feel the emptiness in my breast and almost wish I loved you less. I am completely and utterly in this but I can’t love me for the both of us…maybe deep down you don’t want to do this, I have to stop thinking that you will eventually come around…

Know that I am not only entitled to parts of you. That it’s perfectly normal without asking you, to call and text and spend every waking moment in blissful thoughts of you, and just like that I will take what I can have of you. Learn to share you with the world, knowing fully to whom you belong to. But if you can’t even commit to this, the idea of loving me the way I wish to be loved, if I have to curb my appetite and resist all the love songs and all manner of other lovely drugs, then I am only half happy and only half glad each time you tell me you love me, its half sad.

From you then emanates my greatest unhappiness for depriving me of that which makes me the most happiest. I figured I would wait, stick around until it was too late. Wander on this road alone and find you along the way, ready to FINALLY take the PROVERBIAL plunge.

To my insecure heart doing something wrong whilst knowing it to be so…( impulse or no impulse) the love you have for me should have protected you and you should not have been negligent with all my good feelings. Because even if you lacked intent to do the ACT its not enough for this wound to heal because it aches that there was an act at all.

Yet you are still treasured among men, you still don’t belong to that category that makes “us” us and them “them”. My hearts’ butterflies still flutter after prolonged absences and my fondness only grows with all the nearness. I still choose to keep you and keep hoping in the dark to meet you. When all our eyes are closed and we are alone we all wish to think of the one we cling to.

I don’t know how to tell my heart to say goodbye again, after I had promised this would be the one that would never end. It’s silly I know, to wish and will that all wishing and willing would come true. I can but hold it in my chest and contain it lest it run away with you. Bear it out until only memory is left embedded in a heap of history that was yours and mine… and is now just, another story.