THE BLUE JAY, MR. TUX AND SNEAKY PIE BROWN

There’s a blue jay at my feeder just beyond my windowpane. He looks much too plump to be hungry but there he is in sleet and rain and typical of the blue jay, he squawks and complains, about the food and the service. I feed the birds from late autumn until spring when I am sure they can find wild food to eat.
Though I usually feed them well, I’m not getting cold and soaking wet to give that fat, sassy bird a treat. Not today, it is much to miserable for me to venture out and Mr. Jay will have to just make do or do without. He has grown much to fond of doughnuts and crust of Anadama bread. Today he will have to settle for sunflower seeds instead, and I told him so but of course he sassed me back, had quite a lot to say. Though I didn’t understand a word, his body language made things pretty clear, he wasn’t happy and his foul mood sent two brave sparrows fluttering off to the nearest tree branch. That bird, though handsome is narcissistic and downright rude some days and this seemed to be one of those days. He kept yammering until I was joined by my cat who sprung up to the windowsill to investigate what I was seeing that so held my interest to the point I was ignoring him. He is a very jealous cat.
Tux is my black and white “tuxedo cat”, semi-longhaired. He weighs about twenty pounds give or take two or three. It took about a split-second for Tux to discover what had drawn my attention away from him and of course Tux took offense to the intrusion. I had been distracted by a bird and a sassy one at that. “Lunch, fresh blue jay for lunch,” I know my cat well. I can read his mind. Though he has never been outside except with me and in a kitty play-pen he instinctively knows cats eat birds, or would if they could catch them. Tux is not allowed to catch them, not even a fat sassy one.
Tux immediately attempted to find a way through the glass. Down came the curtains and Tux in a tangled heap on the floor; unhappy cat and a blue jay nearly scared into the next century. With a piercing “thief-thief” scream Mr. Jay flew into the nearest tree. Tux tried once more but lunch had flown the coop. With the blue jay gone Tux quickly lost interest in trying to balance his rotund self on the windowsill and returned to the back of the living room chair where I curl up to read.
The curtains re-hung, I returned to the chair too. I’m reading a good book by Rita Mae Brown and Sneaky Pie Brown; Sneaky Pie is a detective cat, well sort of, he has certainly helped solve many a fascinating mystery.
I sometimes read these stories allowed to Tux. He seems quite impressed with Sneaky Pie and it gives him something adventurous to dream about while he is taking one of his several daily cat naps. I curled up in the chair and began to read. I was just starting chapter 39 of Pay Dirt, reading aloud, and Tux was all ears and kneading my shoulder trying to encourage me along, read faster when we heard Mr. Jay back at the feeder.
I glanced up and Mr. Blue Jay was on the window ledge peering through the window at us. Spying the cat a reasonably safe distance away Mr. Jay made one of his condescending remarks and fluttered to the feeder having decided that sunflower seeds might be quite sufficient after all.
Mr. Tux glanced at the window and back at me. “Read,” he meowed. “This is getting exciting and that bird just isn’t worth the effort. That Lamb and Rice Pâté you have on my kitty food shelf will be just fine for lunch. Come on Miz Annie, read the book. I need to find out whodunit. That Sneaky Pie Brown is a marvelous cat, great author. Keep reading.”
Now how did he know I had Lamb and Rice Pâté on the shelf? I’m trying a new product, lower in calorie and better for indoor cats. Tux really needs a healthier, lower in calorie diet…and more exercise. Maybe I should just let him read this book himself. He apparently reads labels. Let’s not tell him it’s diet food though. Mr. Tux is very sensitive about his appearance and every time I mention a diet he tells me I should talk, “Look in the mirror yourself, Miz Annie,” he meows.
So okay, I admit it. I spend too much time sitting around reading and writing and not enough time at the gym but that cat has no grounds to talk. He likes to sit around reading the Mrs. Murphy Mysteries as much as I do. He is forever on the back of my chair reading over my shoulder and trying to turn the pages for me.

NOTE: Rita Mae Brown is a best selling author and author of the Mrs. Murphy Mystery series mentioned in my story. Sneaky Pie is her tiger cat she adopted from her local SPCA. They have collaborated on several marvelous and exciting novels. Both Mr. Tux and I highly recommend them.