Wind-Up Boyfriend

Wind-Up Boyfriend by Neil McCall

You can keep your shiny androids and your cybernetic man;
I've got a little cutie in the palm of my right hand.
Whose eyes they never wander and his feet they never roam
'Cos his motion doesn't function more than half a mile from home.

He's my wind-up boyfriend
Faithful just to me,
He's my wind-up boyfriend,
And I control the key.

And if I'm feeling frisky and I want a wanton night;
I put my hand upon his back and wind him up so tight.
His rhythm's purest clockwork, but then when I want to sleep
He just runs down beside me and I never hear a peep.

He's my wind-up boyfriend
Never needs to pee,
He's my wind-up boyfriend
And I control the key.

He doesn't love his motherboard like electronic pets
He never starts to pester me to wear those old fishnets
But when I'm in the mood for it he's sprung just like a coil
And will do my bitchy bidding for a little squirt of oil.

He's my wind-up boyfriend
Doesn't stop for tea,
He's my wind-up boyfriend
And I control the key.

No built-in obsolescence, this boy will run and run
And will still be ticking over when my lustful life is done
But when I'm dead and gone, for him there's no escape
I'll leave him to my daughter; he can lick her into shape.

He's my wind-up boyfriend
Under guarantee
He's my wind-up boyfriend
And I control the key.