Take a deep breath and count to ten...

The police controller had had just about enough of this imbecile. It was the controller's job to filter out the emergencies from the routine; to determine what calls should be answered first, if at all (a state made necessary due to never ending increase in demand and a refusal by the powers-that-be to increase resources).

The shift had not started well in the first place, there were supposed to be twelve radio operators but only ten had turned up. Too many members of his team were willing to call in sick after they had sneezed twice in a single hour and today had been no exception. They all blamed the air conditioning which, he agreed, was cheap and inadequate for the size of the computer-filled room and everyone suspected that it was only bought in the first place to keep the computers running at the right temperature and to hell with the people who actually worked there.

The imbecile was in full flow now and his voice had become nasal and somewhat pretentious - a real self-important prick.

'Frankly, I'm astounded that you people can be this incompetent, you do know that I pay your wages ' you have remembered that fact have you officer. Well, have you? Have you?'

'We all pay taxes if that is what you're getting at, sir', the controller wished for once for some originality in the complaints that he received.

'Don't bloody well get smart with me! You know I pay your wages and I want a police car at this address in ten minutes, one minute late and I will be writing to the Chief Constable about you.'

'And as I have told you sir, we are very busy with genuine emergencies¦'

'This is a genuine emergency, a fact that you seem to be ill equipped to comprehend'.

The room was buzzing now, midnight on a busy Friday night and Guildford was full of revelers ending the night out with the usual mix of fights, indecent assault allegations and drunken antics of various degrees of lunacy and inconsiderateness. His officers on the ground were at full stretch and each arrest made took another officer off the streets and made even harder the job of answering the calls that were coming in thick and fast.

One of his radio operators was waving at him across the room, desperately trying to get his attention. She was new to the job and looked a bit panicked.
Covering the mouthpiece of his headset and momentarily cutting off the imbecile the controller answered the hailing operator.

'Yes Sarah what is it?'

'Sir, there's a rape allegation at the County Hospital, 16 year old girl ' been drinking all night at the' Nightwash Nightclub''

'Okay Sarah, no problem. Send the duty Sergeant and a female officer and alert the on-call CID'

'Can't Sir, the Sergeant is dealing with a serious accident on the A31 and CID are at a GBH in Ash'.

Shit. 'Okay, see if you can borrow one from Woking'.

'The Sergeant or CID sir?'

'Pardon?'

'Should I borrow their Duty Sergeant or their CID Sir?'

'Try both'

'They won't like it'

'Try anyway' Christ.

The voice in his earpiece was getting louder again, the imbecile was feeling neglected'

'Are you listening to me officer?' said the imbecile, indignant, and pompous.

'Sorry Sir, there was a job needing my attention'

'This job needs your attention, this bloody dog next door has been barking for three hours now, not that you seem to give a damn'

'As I was saying Sir¦'