Out of Control

The night had started out the same. I arrived just as the clock struck six to begin my shift. I went to the back, changed into my uniform and began to mentally prepare.

Beauty on the in

Beauty on the out

Erase all fear

Erase all doubt

As I finished, I could feel all of my anxiety and insecurities vanish. I was also ready to handle the impossible.The gentlemen's club where I worked, called Eden, had offered me a job when no one else would.They had been looking for a new bar-back and I was lucky enough to take the position. While it might not have been a huge money maker like a dancer or bartender, it suited me just fine." Yo, Cole, I need you to get in here right away, day shift has been lagging behind" barked Cain, in his usual stressed out tone. " On it boss". I worked my way up through the kitchen and opened the door to the stage.

It was lit up with strobe lights of all colours and the surrounding patrons were taking in every aspect. Filling up to  two hundred and fifty on a good night, the place was in full swing. Savy, one of regulars had just emerged from the dressing room, when one of the guys tried to get rough with her. In a split second, Niall was on them and had it broken up." Just another night at Eden folks, go back to your drinks" joked Carter, the house DJ." I thought I was actually going to have to break a sweat this time" said Niall to Cain as he came running." No worries, I got your back bro, so that never has to happen".

Both Niall and Cain are ridiculously handsome. Standing six feet and five foot eight respectively, they have the bodies of Greek gods and smiles that can break a heart in an instant.The bond of friendship they shared also helped them seem irresistible. Sometimes, it was hard to be around them, considering my attraction towards the same sex. While I'm not completely unattractive, with my piercing blue eyes and gold shaggy hair,I always believed I needed something special to help me with my confidence.Hence my little saying, but we'll get back to that later.

Returning my attention back to the bar, I realized that during the commotion, my bus bins had filled up completely in a matter of minutes. As I go to turn the corner, one of the waitresses' and I nearly have a collision." Better watch where you're going darlin' or you won't last long here" sneered Jo, pushing out her boobs. I was about to make an apology, but then decided against it, figuring that she didn't deserve one. Ever since my first day, she went out of her way to make it harder on me. I could understand if it was the positive way people try to encourage you to be tough, but it wasn't.

After reminding myself  to not let it bother me, I managed to get caught up and still have time to watch Layla's act. Layla and I had bonded right off the bat. She had offered me a ride home with her driver, Jimmy, who used to be in the navy. The first song she lead with was always Porn Star Dancing by My Darkest Days. Guys, and even some girls, were immediately enthralled by her presence. As she moved across the metal frame work, she let her routine speak for itself. With lots of gyrating and moaning, she showed off her long brown hair and ample breasts.

Once the crowd was appeased, I headed up the stairs to check on the girls to see if they needed any drinks. To my astonishment,  I found Savy lying on the floor...naked." She's had one too many to be going on now" said Mercedes, giggling to herself.

" Don't worry, I'll handle this".

" You've got to help me get dressed!" she squeals.

" Ok, lets get you sitting up first".

" Which dress do you like more, yellow or white?".

" Definitely, white".

" Thats what I was thinking! It's very Marilyn Monroe!"

Ten minutes later, she was out on the floor and  didn't make a fool of herself. It was getting near to closing and just as I'm about to leave, Cain tells me that were out of Rickard's Red. As if sensing my frustration, he looks at me, trying to figure out the problem." I've never changed a keg" I say, trying  to hide my embarrassment." It's not that hard, I'll show you".

He then takes me to a door that I've never been beyond and reveals to me the way to unlock it with your finger. We walk through a long corridor, which contains several offices. At the very last one, he punches a code into a gate and steps through. I follow, only to find that this is room where alcoholics come to be consumed by their habit. Bottles upon bottles fill the shelves and I find myself in awe of how much all this probably costs.

" It's really not that impressive" he chuckled, while being modest. Another attractive quality. What I would give to be his.

" It's more than impressive, it's amazing. I can tell you've worked very hard to get where you are".

Suddenly, his gaze meets mine and I forget in that moment that he is my boss and that I shouldn't cross this line. No way! He isn't... As my tongue dances behind my lips, he pushes me up against the wall, with lust emanating from his entire body. I can feel his erection, yearning to be free from his jeans. He kisses me with such force; I can tell he's wanted this for a while now. All that pent up energy surges through me, heightening my own desire. Before I let it go any further , I put on the brakes and step away from his embrace.

" What just happened?" 

" Are you that surprised Cole?".

" Please tell me your out to your friends at least, because I don't know if I can handle another guy who is afraid".

" I'm working on it, not everyone has that kind of courage. That's what I like about you".

I instantly blush. No guy has ever been this nice to me before. Feeling my defenses fall, he leans in again and kisses me ever so slightly.

" Tell me you'll at least think about it".

" Layla is waiting, I've got to go".

 I ran out as quickly as I could. I make to the van, but as soon as I shut the door,  tears begin to roll down my face. Knowing that I don't want to talk about it, Layla just lets me cry as she looks out the window to watch oncoming traffic. We eventually make to my place. I say my good-nights and hop into bed,hoping that tomorrow would be a better day.