If That's Possible

If that's possible.

It feels possible. It's in your eyes. The blue disguise of your emotions as you try to hide the truth.

I've memorised the shade of blue. It reminds me so much of you. The colour that makes me think anything is possible. Anything at all.

You're starting to think it's possible.

Even through the act, the brave face I wear so well, you've never guessed how long I wait for your owl. My smile is like no other when I read your letters. I reread them at night, when I'm thinking of you and all the things you do. My heart skips a beat as recent memories fill my head. I lose myself in the setting. The setting that wouldn't be perfect without you.

You're reaching for the impossible.

Sitting in the cold sun, the breeze ruffling our hair. I start to shiver, and you tentatively place an arm around my shoulders. We watch, silently, as the sun reaches the horizon, the waves of the water splashing the edge of the beach, the train rolling past behind us. Everything is oblivious to how much this moment means to us.

You turn your head to stare at me, stare at my reaction to this beautiful place. Our place. I mutter something about the sunset being beautiful. You reply by whispering the company was better.

Then you lean in, I close my eyes and breath escapes my lips.

You know its possible.

Walking through lush green fields, the longest blades of emerald grass skimming my knees. Buttercups and thistles make patterns in the grass. I trace the edges of the waxy green leaves with my fingertips, watching as you watch me from the other side of the hedgerow. You're smiling, and I love the way you look at me.

You begin to speak, and I lose my footing and stumble over. I can't quite register the words you've said, and you begin to tense. You're probably thinking that I'm going to crush your dreams and reply with a gentle let down. For some strange reason, you're completely taken aback by my stuttering reply of acceptance. As if it wasn't clear how I felt for you.

My mind begins to register what had just happened. He's now my boyfriend. That guy over there is my boyfriend. The tall, funny idiot over there is my boyfriend.

And everything is possible when we're together. Everything feels right. It's impossible to describe how I feel when he isn't near. Or when I know he's waiting for me at the bus stop. He makes me happy, he makes me smile, he makes me think there will be no other guy in a long while.

He calls it falling in love. All I know is that I crave his company. I'd love to be with him forever and always.

If that's possible.