The Missing Madonna, Part 3, Chapter 23/1 "Back Home"

Part 3

"MARI'S CHILD"

“But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart”

(Luke chapter 2, verse 19)

“And the child grew, and waxed strong in spirit, filled with wisdom: and the grace of God was upon him”
(Luke chapter 2, verse 40)

“They found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and asking them questions. And all that heard him were astonished at his understanding and answers”

(Luke chapter 2, verses 46,47)

Chapter 23 BC 1, Ab Urbe Condita 753

We’re home. It was a long journey and tiring but we had company all the way and the merchants had a couple of youths with them who helped me with the children, particularly with Joshua and James so that I could concentrate on looking after Salome. She’s just begun to walk, but only a few steps before she totters and falls, so that was not a lot of help on our long march. However, she did enjoy riding the donkey and she had quite a good balance although I stayed close in case she slipped. The merchants chose to use the route via Bethlehem to Jerusalem instead of the Roman road all the way, which was good of them. We developed quite a friendship with them though we said nothing that might have hinted at Joshua’s special status.

It was nearly dark as we approached our village and I was nervous that our home would have been wrecked or taken over by others in our absence and we’d find ourselves with nowhere to stay. Joseph was more confident, however. He was sure that our neighbours would look after our interests until we returned. ‘We did leave without any intimation of where we were going or why’, I said, ‘so they had no idea of how long we’d be gone’.

At least the house was still standing. Joseph pushed at the door and it screeched open – the hinges were rusty and needed some oil. At first it was too dark to see much. I found and lit a candle – there were some lights aflame in the street and I took the candle from one of the bags on the donkey and ignited it from that source. I held it up and looked around our room. It was empty. Completely empty. Even our large water pots had gone. I know we had taken many things with us, as much as we could pack, but everything we’d left had disappeared. I followed Joseph as he walked through to his workshop at the back. That was empty too. All the stacks of timber had gone, even the rough table and bench where he rested wood for sawing. His tools were not there, of course, he’d taken those and had them stolen at Pelusium. He had new tools now, but he’d have to start again from scratch for everything else.

Luckily I had brought most of our belongings from Alexandria with us. We’d make do tonight with what we had – the same as we’d used on our journey, of course. In the morning I’d assess what we needed and make a list of the priorities to buy. I fed Salome and got her to sleep as quickly as I could and James was soon asleep as well, but Joshua was excited and wanted to go out into the night and explore. Joseph had to chase after him and promise to let him roam the town to his heart’s desire in the morning before he allowed us to steer him towards his bedroll and sleep.

At length we were able to rest ourselves and although we were exhausted, both of us lay awake for some time, thinking about all we’d been through. I’d been so concentrating on getting us home safely that I’d hardly given any thought to what we’d do on arrival. I suppose I’d assumed we’d just carry on where we’d left off, but of course I soon realised that that was very naïve of me. Lying on our bed in the empty room, I began to think seriously about the future.

First thing tomorrow I’d need to deal with the practicalities. I’d need to find a water jar. I’d a couple of cooking pots and a small jar that would have to suffice initially – I’d left the large pots with Dora as they were too bulky to bring. I had some food we’d purchased earlier in the day but I’d need to see if Ishmael, the baker, still had his stall in the market. I realised that our return would be news and would reverberate around the village, so I might as well go to the well at the usual time for all the women and tell them our news. I was curious to meet my former friends, especially Ruth and see how Benjamin had grown and whether he had brothers and sisters.

I think Joseph is a little worried at the possibility that other carpenters might have moved in and taken care of the trade he once had. It might take time to build up trust and confidence again but I know that he’s a good craftsman and others think highly of his skills. I’m sure he’ll reassemble the equipment he needs for his trade and when news gets out of his return, his old customers will flock back.

These thoughts are flowing through my head and keeping me awake. I think Joseph is still awake too, for he is silent. When he is asleep I can hear his steady breathing. I wonder what he is thinking. Is he nervous about our future or is he just relieved to be home? I wonder now if we can just slip back into routine with everything the same as before or whether there have been big changes. I’m sure there’ll be new children to admire. I can show them James and Salome and won’t they be surprised to see how Joshua has grown and how intelligent and articulate he is. I wonder how he’ll compare with Ruth’s Ben. Will the two boys immediately resume their friendship?

Perhaps Joseph can go to Ein-Karem and see Zechariah and Elizabeth. We must meet them soon and find out what news they have of mother and my brother and sisters. It’s been a long time with no news. We must get a message to them to say we’re back in Judea. I wonder what they’ve made of our absence. Perhaps they came looking for us at the Passover Festival and found our house empty. What would our neighbours have told them? Perhaps they think we’ve been taken by Herod and killed. We’ve not told anyone where we’ve been, for fear of news getting back to Herod. We must find a way of letting them know we are alive and well as soon as possible.

The more I think about these matters, the wider awake I become. And just when I’m becoming drowsy at last I hear Salome whimpering and rouse myself and go to her. I suckle her, but she is slow and I nearly drop off while she is still at my breast. Then I notice that her eyes are closed too and I risk laying her down before I have winded her properly. Perhaps I’ll pay for this when she wakes me again, but I’m too weary now and I must have fallen asleep as soon as I’d settled her, for I remember no more.

I’m lucky. Salome is still sleeping when James stirs, then Joshua. Joseph is already up and moving around out in the courtyard behind his workshop. I can hear scraping and wonder what he is doing. I peer out of the door and find him digging in the earth using a chisel for apparently our spade has disappeared as well.

“What on earth are you doing?” I shout to him.

“I’m looking for the gifts the sheiks brought before we left. Don’t you remember? We decided it was too risky to taker them, so we buried them – here I thought, but I can’t find them at the moment.”

“It was just as well we didn’t take them. They’d have been stolen with the rest of our goods.”

“Well, I can’t find them. I thought I buried them here, though perhaps they’re deeper than I can reach with this tool.”

“It doesn’t matter now, does it? There’s lots of other things we must do. Can’t that wait?”

“I just thought I’d reassure myself that those valuable things were still here. You were still asleep. I try again later. I’ll borrow a spade from someone and dig a bit deeper. I’m sure it was about here I buried them.”

Joseph comes back and helps me feed the two boys. He promises to look after James and Salome if she wakes while I pick out our largest pot from the pack we’d just untied from the donkey’s back and venture forth into the daylight and the stirring village. I think I’ll get water first and come back via Ishmael in the hope that he has fresh bread I can buy. As soon as I set foot outside our house I nearly bump into Susannah who is obviously making her way to the well too.

“Well, bless my soul, if it isn’t the disappearing Mari! It is you, isn’t it? You’ve changed a bit, but I’d know you anywhere. Where on earth have you been? We thought you’d left us all for good.”

“We’ve been in Egypt.”

“Heavens above! Why on earth did you go there? I suppose you knew what was going to happen. You got out just in time, I must say.”

“What do you mean? What’s happened?”

“That’s your Joshua there, I suppose. I shouldn’t flaunt him before the other women if I were you.”

“Why not? What’s wrong?”

“Do you mean to say you don’t know?”

Before she can say any more we’re joined by a couple of other women, one of whom has a young child in her arms. Then, coming up the road, I see the familiar form of Ruth and my heart leaps. I grab Joshua and rush to meet her.

“Ruth, it’s you. I am so glad to see you again. Here’s Joshua. Where’s Ben? How is he?”

“Mari, it’s really you? You’ve come back to us? We thought you’d abandoned and forgotten all about us. You sent us no message, we couldn’t imagine what had happened to you.”

Ruth seems changed. She looks older, lined, more careworn. Well, she is older of course, so am I. But she looks much older than I feel. Perhaps she has many children now.

“I’d not forgotten you, Ruth, how could I? But we had an emergency, I’ll tell you all about it soon. But first tell me, how’s Ben? And have you other children now? I have two more, I left Joseph looking after James, he’s three and I have a little daughter, Salome, who’s just walking.”

“I’ve two daughters now, Rachel and Esther.”

“And how old is Ben now? Where is he? Joshua’d love to gang up with him again, I’m sure.”

“Do you really not know, Mari? Do you really not know what happened when you went away? We thought that’s why you’d gone.”

“What happened, Ruth? Will no-one tell me? You’re all talking in riddles. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“He’s dead, Mari. Days after you left us. Dead with all the other children.”

”What! How? Was there an epidemic? That’s awful. I’m so sorry, Ruth, I really am.” I’m shocked. She’s looking at me accusingly as though I should have known. How could I know?

“No, Mari. He was killed. Murdered. Slaughtered by Herod’s soldiers along with all the other boys in the village. Do you mean to say you really didn’t know? We thought that’s why you’d gone. That someone tipped you off and you fled to save Joshua’s life. Why didn’t you tell us, Mari? Why didn’t you tell us? We could have escaped as well.”

I’m horrified. Dumbstruck. I can’t look her in the face. I feel her eyes boring into mine and look down while I try to compose myself. She’s saying something more, but I can’t take it in. I feel hot and flushed, dizzy. Joshua has run off somewhere. When eventually I compose myself and look up, Ruth is cradling Joshua in her arms. Tears are pouring down her face and Joshua is looking at her in great puzzlement. The other women are now crowded round us in a circle staring at me and Joshua. They are waiting for me to say something. What can I say?

“I didn’t know, Ruth. I swear to you I didn’t know. Joseph thought we might be in danger, so we left by night, but it never occurred to me that you might be at risk because you knew me.”

“It wasn’t just me, Mari. Everyone in the village suffered. All the boys…”

Ruth broke down in mid sentence and wept piteously once more. Other women started crying too. What on earth have I stirred up here?

“Please, please tell me. I don’t understand. What has all this to do with us?”

The women start whispering among themselves. No-one says anything further to me and they begin to walk slowly towards the well. I don’t know if I should join them or hang back. Are they angry or ashamed at my return? Am I not welcome? I don’t know what to do.