When Snails Ruled the Earth

In a land and a time before man, a land and time before even
dinosaurs lay a great empire, possibly the greatest ever beheld on
earth. What happened to it I hear you call therein lies a tale of
betrayal, disobedience and ignorance therein lies the tale of the
snailus-molluscium empire.

It started when the earth was new, and like most beings god was
starting small. The earth was still a great laboratory and god had yet
to perfect the most beautiful creature ever created.

"At last" cried the Almighty one.

"Finally it is done, a creature as unique as a snowflake and as
colourful as the sunrise" God Said.

God stared admiringly at his handy work for a while and after a short
period, breathed upon the creature and thus the first snail was brought
into the world. God had given life to the snail and given them a
beautiful paradise too rule over, God asked only one thing in
return.

"Little one whom I have given part of myself too, and given a home as
pretty as the twinkling stars I have but one command of you" God told
the snail.

"Anything, and it shall be, your word is our sacred law" spoke the
little snail.

"Then I ask this and no more, never leave your shell, for my wrath will
be great and the punishment severe. I have given you snail the most
beautiful home in all antiquity and great care must be taken with such
a glorious treasure" said God.

"Now little snail go into the world, and soon I will send a vast empire
to be at your disposal. But be warned I am a part of you and thus you a
part of me I see everything even that which you desire to hide" and
with this god placed the snail on earth and set back to his work.

In time more snails appeared in paradise and soon a great empire was
forged, and Gods words just as promised were sacred law. It was during
the height of the snailus-molluscium empire that Gods rule was
questioned, not in public but in secret meetings.

Rebellion was in the air, snail after snail complained about the
weight, shape and even the beautiful colours of their shells. Until one
night a young snail called Shellon decided to leave his shell just for
a moment to see what it was like.

To his surprise nothing happened, he felt as light as a feather his
slimy body allowed him to squeeze through the tiniest gaps he felt
naughty and alive. So Shellon made a promise to himself that each night
he would sneak out and spend some time without his shell.

Day after day, night after night Shellon continued to take bigger risks
without his shell, squeezing through tighter and tighter gaps. Until
finally he was caught, news spread like wild fire through the entire
snailus-molluscium empire.

People where astounded that this little snail had defied the word of
god and yet nothing had happened. He was not punished, not even a
warning was placed before him by the almighty God.

It was decided a great meeting would be held to decide Shellons'
punishment, and to discuss the matter further. It was decided that the
meeting would be held as soon as possible and every snail in the world
would attend. The venue would be set as the redwood emporium, and the
travel time allowed only three years to get there.

Every snail hurried madly to get to the destination in time and finally
millions of snails, all colours, sizes and ages lined the redwood
emporium. Right in the middle stood little Shellon totally bewildered
by the amount of trouble he was in.

"So What Is to be done?" cried a tall important looking snail.

"Prison, death, freedom" all these and more where heard echoing around
the arena.

"Death it is" cried the important fattish snail directly in front of
him, to this the whole arena erupted in outrage and some cheers.

"SILENCE" bellowed a voice from the shadows in an authoritative
tone.

Shoobar the oldest wisest snail in all of Snaildom stepped into the
middle of the giant emporium.

"The little-one is not to blame" said Shoobar

"Then who is you?" cried the fat snail in front of Shellon
mockingly.

Shoobar slivered up to him slowly (it took 3 days).

"Do not try my patience with your wit or lack of it snail" spoke
Shoobar darkly and once back in his place (a further 3 days) he
continued to speak.

"The little one is not too blame for his own curiosity, it is our own
dark rumours and back alley meetings that have led to us breaking gods
law" Shoobar continued.

"Maybe God's laws don't make much sense to us bu&;#8230;" A young
opportunist snail called Shellfish had stepped in and started to
speak.

"That's right ooh wisest of the snailus-molluscium empire, his mother
should deal with him its' only fair and I also agree that Gods laws do
not make much sense" Shoobar tried to cut back in but was shouted down
quickly.

"God, he who brought us to this place expects us to follow his laws I
tell you now this is not an act of thankfulness on our part. It is an
act of control on his part we are locked in a prison and we all know
who the prison officer is, GOD himself". Cheers started to echo through
the great hall.

Shellfish added this to his comments.

"GOD IS NOT OUR DELIVERER FROM DARKNESS, GOD IS THE OPPRESSOR OF THE
SNAILUS-MOLLUSCIUM EMPIRE" the crowd erupted cheers louder than ever
echoed through the stadium.

"SO NOW FELLOW SNAIL KIND CAST DOWN YOUR SHELLS AND JOIN ME IN A NEW
AGE OF NO RULES AND NO LIMITS" and when he finished speaking Shellfish
tossed his Shell into the hoarding crowd.

Snail after snail followed suit in an orgy of rule breaking.

CRACK went the lightning across the sky and the earth, sea and heaven
itself moved and shook forming a face and eventually a body until there
stood the almighty himself.

Fury rained down from the skies and God spoke in rage at the
snailus-molluscium empire.

"Dare you defy me, I who have given you a gift as individual as a
snowflake, as beautiful as a sunrise" GOD looked around the
sinners.

"Please forgiv.." said Shellfish.

"Silence" spoke the lord and as he did the sky became like coal.

"I have asked little but still you disobey my word so as I have decreed
punishment must be given. For those who did not take off their shells
they will be spared but their shells will be attached to their living
body so as not to be stolen." God continued.

"But for those of you who took part in this most blasphemous act you
will no longer have homes, you will spend the rest of your days
searching for a home but never finding one, you will all know pain and
death as punishment for your dark thoughts. A knew name will be given
to you who shun individuality, you who shun the good, you who defy me
this name shall be SLUG" and with a single breath all was as God said
in the world.

So the next time you see a Slug don't kill it, they're not doing you
any harm they're still remembering and cursing the name Shellon.
Sometimes, very rarely, if you look closely, you can catch a SLUG day
dreaming about when Snails ruled the earth.