the opportunist

s/he’ll stand for just what you
want her/too,
s/he’ll pull out all the stops,
s/he’ll stay up all day & night
to gain another ballot box,
s/he’ll visit towns & villages
that no one knows exist,
s/he’ll bow down, suck off,
kiss up, bend over,
as long as the election
s/he wins.

s/he takes on many faces
s/he’s new & improved,
comfortable & old fashioned---
s/he’s as hip as you need her/him
to be, s/he’s as comfortable &
quaint (like mash potatoes,
ice cream & all comfort foods of
the self-pity-alone-on-a-weekend-
night can produce)---
s/he’s the friend you’ve always known,
s/he’s the famous one you
envy,
s/he’s the key to all your happiness &
if you don’t think so right now,
s/he will convince you
quickly.

s/he says everything that YOU want to,
so that you don’t need to get off the
couch,
s/he is as photogenic as a supermodel
or as ugly as the Grouch---
for what it takes to win your faith
in this crippled & corrupt
system,
is nothing but a moment of your time &
a voice for you to
listen.