X Darts chapter 22

Chapter 22

I read the log and passed it to The Poet. The Poet read the log and
passed it to AkiMat. AkiMat read the log and passed it to Seven. It was
like a game of pass the parcel, except we knew who the winner would be.
It was 16.

Finally 16 read the log.

I wanted to say something but I didn't know what. These things are
difficult. When 16 finished reading he closed the book and put it on
the table. It sat there like a cup of tea that was too hot to drink.
Nobody spoke. Maybe everyone felt the same as me, maybe nobody knew
what to say. We stood in silence and outside was water and more
silence. I wondered how I would feel if it was me.

After a while I couldn't stand it any more. "What now Captain?" I
said. "All hands on deck?"

Captain Vegas looked around the room and then outside. He put his
hands on his hips. We waited for his words. I believe each of us would
have done anything he said. I believe we felt that somehow we had done
him wrong.

"Let's get going," he said. "It's a new day."

He was right. It was.

"Tally-ho," said Captain Vegas. I could tell he was trying to make the
best of it. We had to do the same, we at least owed him that.

16 went outside and pulled up the anchor, Captain Vegas took his place
at the wheel and The Poet battened down the hatches. Then we were
off.

It was a beautiful morning. The sun was hoisting itself into the sky
and there was a balmy breeze rustling the leaves in the trees. We made
a beeline out of Salhouse Broad and hung a left back on to the River
Bure.

In the kitchen Seven made breakfast. He cooked bacon, eggs, tomatoes,
sausages, mushrooms, black-pudding, the lot. Then he served it on
plates piled high where we sat. Captain Vegas ate with one hand on the
wheel. When tomato juice dribbled down his chin I wiped it with a
tissue but I didn't make a big deal of it. Those days had gone.

In fact, breakfast seemed to solve something, as if breakfast had been
an accountant poring over a debit and credit book and he had decided
that the columns did in fact balance. So after breakfast I suggested
sunbathing and everyone agreed.

We put on our swimming-trunks and then we sat outside on the deck, me,
16, Seven, AkiMat and The Poet. The sun was higher in the sky now, hot
and I was just about to ask Seven to tell me about another one of his
tattoos when I happened to glance into the cabin. I saw Captain Vegas
sitting at the wheel. His hair was in a perfect quiff, he was wearing
his shiny suit. He looked happy enough but now I knew different.

I whispered something to Seven, to 16, to AkiMat and to The Poet. In
turn they nodded their heads and said it was the best idea they had
heard for some time.

"Shall we do it?" I said.

"Let's do it," said the others.

Captain Vegas never knew what hit him. Within seconds Seven and I had
his clothes off. Then 16 appeared clutching Captain Vegas's swimming
trunks. He slipped them on to Captain Vegas, first one leg and then the
other and tied the draw-string at his waist in a bow.

Meanwhile The Poet was busy setting up a system of mirrors, he was
like a young Galileo on acid. He fixed the final one in place just as
we finished lathering all of Captain Vegas's body in sun cream.

"There," said 16, explaining perhaps what didn't need to be explained,
"now you are one of us. You are wearing swimming-trunks, you are
covered in sun cream and the mirrors will reflect the sun on to your
body. You can be captain of the ship and sunbathe at the same
time."

Captain Vegas nodded his head. Then he looked at each of us in
turn.

"Thank you," he said as if the words meant something completely
different. "Yes. Thank you."

"Cup of tea anyone?" said Seven.

We all put up our hands. Every one of us. Even Captain Vegas.

I imagined the headlines, "ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT. CAPTAIN
VEGAS HAS CUP OF TEA."

Lunch-time found us in Wroxham Broad.

"It's a big one, isn't it?" said The Poet, putting his hand to his
forehead and staring out across the flat waters.

"Do you remember my brothers?" said Seven.

"One to Six and you," said 16.

"That's right," said Seven. "Well, on days like this we would go
skinny-dipping."

Before anyone else had a chance to say or do anything Captain Vegas
leapt up and wiggled his hips. "GOOD IDEA," he said, "I'D LIKE TO GO
SKINNY-DIPPLING, REALLY I WOULD. THAT WOULD BE GREAT. IF'S THERE'S
ANYTHING I WOULD LIKE TO DO, IT WOULD BE TO GO SKINNY-DIPPING."

Then, like he was peeling a Satsuma with loose skin, he slipped out of
his trunks and dived into the water with a scream.

"Do you think he's all right?" said The Poet.

I nodded my head. "He's just coming out. It can effect different
people in different ways."

Suddenly 16 shrunk to a tiny size and slipped between the coils of the
anchor rope. "Coming out," he said in a voice that was much too big for
his new body, "coming out. What do you mean?"

"Didn't you read the log?" I said.

Now 16's voice was small, as if it had been lagging behind the size of
his body and had finally caught up. "I didn't get it," he said. "All
this talk of bastions always goes over my head. It must be an age
thing."

I was going to answer but I was interrupted by another shout from the
water. "COME ON YOU BUNCH OF POOFS. GET IN. THE WATER'S LOVELY."

What could I say? With a whoop I pulled off my trunks and dived over
the side. Like torpedoes falling on a helpless village quickly I was
joined by the others, by The Poet, Seven, AkiMat and 16. 16, I'm glad
to say, was back to full-size.

Captain Vegas had been right, the water was lovely. It was both
aesthetically lovely and physically lovely. Physically just because it
felt nice and aesthetically because, for example, when someone upended
and went under the water their bum would appear and disappear like the
fast setting of a full moon. That was nice.

After about an hour and just as I was about to duck Seven because he
had ducked me I felt a tug on my arm. It was 16. I wasn't sure, but I
did think he looked slightly smaller than usual. But perhaps that was
just the refraction of the sun.

"Are you OK?" I said.

"You remember yesterday?" said 16.

"The day before today?"

"That's right," said 16. "And I said I was in love."

I remembered. 16 was staring at the steelworkers. They had had their
arms folded and their muscles were rippling. "I told you," I said,
"that was just infatuation. And besides those steelworkers weren't
nice."

"I didn't mean the steelworkers," said 16. "I meant Captain Vegas. I'm
in love with Captain Vegas."

"Oh my God," I said. Then it hit me. It was like a bolt again and I
understood everything. 16 shouting, 16 leaping up, 16 wiggling his
hips.

"Do you think I should tell him?" said 16, his head bobbing next to
me.

"Didn't you read the log?" I said. "He said he loved you."

"I told you," said 16, "I didn't really understand it. I thought maybe
it was a metaphor."

"It wasn't a metaphor," I said. "He loves you. You have to tell him
how you feel. Now."

"OK," said 16.

Captain Vegas was about fifty metres away splashing water with the
flats of his hands at The Poet and AkiMat.

"Now," I said.

"OK," said 16. He cupped his hands into a cone around his mouth and
shouted.

"Captain GLUG Vegas. GLUG GLUG. Captain Vegas. I GLUG love you. GLUG
GLUG GLUG."

With his hands cupped over his mouth 16 was finding it difficult to
keep his head above the water. But it didn't matter. Captain Vegas got
the message. He leapt out of the water, gave his hips a celebratory
wiggle and landed with a splash. On his face was a smile.

"OK?" said 16.

"OK," I said.

"What now?" said 16.

"I don't know," I said. "That's for you and Captain Vegas to
decide."

"Right," said 16. "I get it. That's for me and Captain Vegas to
decide."