Sunday Post Mortem

How did the boy sit onnit?
Thon galvy bucket? Tried it
hev’ ye? Damned uncomfae,
Oor Wullie mustae
hadda guy sair erse.
They Broons werenae
onny better- a fam'ly
thon size an’ nae a
schemey orra wumman
on the CB wi’ kids
frae a hauf dizzen
glaiket wasters.
Cum awn, Scotlan’s
ain peyper? Ach,
away an bile yer heid!