Three bears in assorted sizes

A very long time ago a farmer’s wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl with bright yellow hair. She was so amazed by this that she wanted to call the girl buttercup.

The farmer himself disagreed with her. He thought it was a silly name but suggested that as the family had to sell all the butter they could make and couldn’t afford to eat it themselves, they should call her Marge instead.

So Marge grew up in due course and it soon turned out that her beauty was just about her only real attribute. In modern terms she was as dumb as they come; in fact she was probably the original dumb blonde!

Then one day her mother sent her off to the landlord’s house with a bag full of beans. “You mind you don’t lose any of them on the way,” she was told, “Them beans is this weeks rent for our cottage.”

Marge managed to find her way to the landlord and handed in her bag full of beans. The landlord also thought she was becoming very beautiful and offered her a job in his house tidying up and making his bed, but Marge said “No” as she had to go back home in time to muck out the pigs.

She was in a bit of a state as she left the house and took a wrong turning as she walked across the fields.

In no time at all, the strikingly beautiful blonde girl was lost. Not an unusual occurrence for her, but this time nobody she asked seemed to know where she lived either. She was quite sure it was around here somewhere but she could find no place she recognised. Seeing an attractive looking clump of trees in the distance she struck out on her own and headed in that direction.

It was a hot day and it was very pleasant when she finally reached the shade amongst the trees. She wandered along in the cool of the forest forgetting what she was doing and where she was trying to go. The long walk had made her feel thirsty so she was very happy to see a pleasant looking cottage situated in a small clearing.

She tapped gently on the door as she’d been taught, before walking round the whole cottage trying to find somebody to ask if she could have a drink of water. There was no one there! So she walked back to the front door and tried knocking a bit harder. There was no answer this time either, but the door swung open gently as she knocked. ‘Oh well,’ she thought ‘if there’s nobody at home then I’ll pop in and find a drink for myself before I leave and nobody will be the wiser’.

She soon found the kitchen where there was a jug full of water and three mugs on a table. After her drink she carefully washed the mug and put it back with the others. But by now she was feeling tired after walking across the fields and through the wood and when she found a bedroom with three comfy looking beds in it she couldn’t resist the temptation to lay down on the biggest for a rest, so she was soon sound asleep.

Marge was woken up by the sound of someone coming up the stairs, so she hid in a cupboard in case she was found to be doing something wrong.

The people came into the room and she heard a rather gruff voice say, “Someone’s been sleeping in my bed!”

A rather nicer voice said “Someone’s left the cupboard door open!”

Then a person with a squeaky small voice opened the cupboard door and said “Boo!”

Marge came out of the cupboard ready to apologise to the people, but to her amazement there were three bears standing in the room.

One of the bears was very big and covered with long dark hair. “Hello young lady I suppose it was you sleeping in my bed,” he said in a gruff voice, “my name is Daddy Bear.”

Marge bobbed a little courtesy and said “Pleased to meet you sir.”

The middle sized bear didn’t have such long hair as Daddy and her voice was much nicer. “Well she doesn’t seem to be doing any harm," she said, "perhaps she could stay for a little while if she’d like to.” Then she added “Hello dear my name is Mummy Bear.”

Marge bobbed again and shyly said “My name’s Marge.”

The smallest bear was nearly bald all over and obviously very young. He just giggled and said “My name’s Fred Bear!”

In the end the three bears decided to look after her. It was very convenient to have somebody with proper hands to do all the chores, and she could tell trespassers to go away without making them scream. It also turned out that just like the bears, all she ate was porridge.

“There’s just one thing,” said Daddy Bear one day. “We can’t keep calling you Marge. Your hair is such a lovely golden colour I think we ought to call you Goldie locks.”

And so it was that another fairy story was born and all the people who write pantomimes stood up and cheered.