Developing a Shady Crush

it's strange how these things work, but yesterday when he sat there telling me how his life sucked, something in me went from Awwww to Awwwoh.
Maybe it was the way he refused to feel sorry for himself, even though I did, or the way his eyes lit up when he laughed at me, which he did alot, or the fact that he's just such a nice guy...

wait, who am i kidding? been here, done that.
Every now and then i have a tendency to develop a crush on some poor and helpless dude, whom i think i can adopt and makeover into some strong macho man, but it never works, and i usually just end up with a poor and helpless dude who whines alot because i've encouraged him to talk about his feelings.
So we all know this one's going down the drain.
But when i emailed him a thank you for our brunch (he paid), and he sent back that cute little seductive note, i felt a little twitch and couldn't stop myself from grinning. And i think i had him blushing when i called him a smart ass, and resisted the urge to quip "Well i don't know about your ass, but i'm sure it's smart".
Cunningly tried to mannouver him into saying he'd like to go out thursday night to Andrea (pub on the beach), but he didn't fall for it, said he might have to work late.
Who am i kidding? i can't even picture him dancing with me. He'd probably sit in a corner and mope.
"You will walk all over him!" my mind screams.
"No I won't!" i yell back.
"You will too!"
"I will not!"
"Shut Up!"
"I'm not even speaking! I'm only thinking!"
"Well stop thinking then!"

and since luck couldn't get any worse, my eyes busted out again so i had to resort to swimming blind in the pool, thinking
"Now what are the odds of Mister Gleaming Biceps showing up?"
and low and behold, there he is.
Damn it.
God definitely has a plan and it doesn't include me and Biceps.
Score:

GOD: TWO.

Me: Zero.

Then when i sigh and give up, getting out of the water, Biceps grins up at me and tells me he'll call me, and we both smirk because we know "I'll call you tonight" means he'll call either next week or never.
*Sigh*
But i have this video that he really wants, so maybe i could seduce him with it.
Hmmmmm.

Have regressed to point of checking out male model pictures on FordModels.com

I am a sad sad sad person.