Seasons (Naga-Uta*)
By hadley
Mon, 28 Jul 2008
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2 comments
Then, when the rain stops
and you step outside, to walk
once again, barefoot
over the wet grass, like that
long lost girl-woman
of innocent summer sex,
you remember how
we fell from fields of endless
summer, into this
slow stilted urban decay.
And wonder, wonder
why all these heaped mistakes
cannot be erased.
Time will move on, once again
leaving us behind.
As seasons fall down slowly
into stilled winter
and all its frozen promise
of dark days, will we
waste the mellow autumn years
lost in memory
regretting our lost summer
and the spring we never used?
(*How to Write a Naga Uta: http://www.ehow.com/how_2286175_write-naga-uta.html)
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This is lovely, I think, and
Permalink Submitted by onemorething on
This is lovely, I think, and suits the idea of poignancy or creating feeling very well. Though 'why all these heaped mistakes' is six syllables not seven, but could easily be resolved I guess with 'why all of these heaped mistakes'. Unless I misunderstood the form. The ending is excellent.
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